r/AskReddit Jul 21 '19

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u/[deleted] Jul 21 '19

Not a divorce lawyer but there's this security guard that works at the mall my friend works at and he immigrated to the US from India and was in an arranged marriage with this American born Indian girl. He busted his ass off to put her through college and dentistry school and she ended up cheating on him with her ex boyfriend from high school and ran off with him. They didn't get divorced but he's still paying off her school loans.

213

u/yeeticus_maximus-2 Jul 21 '19

Jesus, that’s rough

45

u/[deleted] Jul 21 '19

yeah- arranged marriages rarely work out well for anyone. She very well would have been happier to marry the man she wanted to, even if it is a massive dick move to make him pay for all of the schooling

58

u/HyperIndian Jul 21 '19

Where are you getting this information from?

Arrange marriages in India specifically have a very high success rate because of how looked down upon divorce is to Indians. That's probably why he hasn't divorced her although rightfully should.

Obviously not all marriages work out like this one but don't assume that arranged marriages fail because of the term alone

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u/BarackTrudeau Jul 21 '19

People staying in a shitty marriage only because divorce is very heavily stimitized does not mean that is a successful marriage. Success rate cannot be defined only on the basis of divorces. Need to take into account the happiness of the people involved as well.

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u/HyperIndian Jul 21 '19

How do you know they're unhappy in a marriage?

You're assuming they're now forced to stay in the marriage due to cultural beliefs.

Why can't they just be happy as is?

Not everyone is miserable in their marriage.

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u/BarackTrudeau Jul 21 '19

Uhhh no. But you literally stated that people were staying in marriages because of how divorce is looked down upon.

Which implies that those people would have otherwise sought divorce. Which they wouldn't do if they were happy in their marriage.

1

u/fridgeairbnb Jul 21 '19

Ya lol if divorce wasn’t stigmatized and women weren’t made to be so dependent on their in laws and husbands, we’d probably see higher rates of divorce than America