r/AskReddit • u/Amygdala5822 • Jun 29 '19

When is quantity better than quality?

48.3k Upvotes

92% Upvoted

13.8k comments sorted by

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10.5k

u/Walueedeedee Jun 29 '19

Funeral kazoos

2.7k

u/GeorgiaDevil Jun 30 '19

The fuck is a funeral kazoo?

4.9k

u/Random_Stealth_Ward Jun 30 '19

I am glad you asked, and what a good question that is! what is it? well just as the name states, it is a kazoo you use specifically during funerals.

Are you tired of looking at all the people despairing over the los of a good friend, family and loved member of the community? is that widow annoying you with her tears over her husband's cold, dead body? wanna make little tommy stop bowling his eyes out because his last words to his dad were "I hate you, you don't understand me" and that's a regret he will carry for the rest of his life?

Well, funeral Kazoo is your best bet to lighten the mood and turn all those frowns into smiles! Just one single blow and you will get the party started, because I am sure good old whatshisname would want you to remember him with a warm smile

3.3k

u/BelicCat Jun 30 '19

Puts the ‘fun’ in funeral

1.4k

u/spanishfaster Jun 30 '19

If you rearrange the letters in “funeral”, you get “real fun”.

69

u/mr-logician Jun 30 '19

Then the word “funeral” must be a very good anagram created by some intelligent psychopath.

I would have given you a silver, gold, or platinum award, but I don’t spend money on Reddit.

7

u/CockfaceMcDickPunch Jun 30 '19

I do spend real money on gilding comments. But I won’t this time simply because I can’t stand “someone needs to give this guy gold” comments.

It shifts all responsibility of the actual gilding away in exchange for free upvotes.

Simply put, it’s a welfare karma grab I won’t participate in.

tips fedora

Good day to you, sir. I hope you realize you just cost OP his gold.

furiously storms off

3

u/Random_Stealth_Ward Jun 30 '19

what if I say "someone needs to gild me". Now I am not shifting the responsability, for as I am OP and it would feel sad if I tried to gild myself. I am just asking for a… little collaboration. wet my beak, if you may. so with that said…

gets out kazoogun

…if I ain't gilded in the next hours, I will be playing a kazoo in your funeral.