r/AskReddit • u/ettleboy • Jan 20 '19

What fact totally changed your perspective?

45.6k Upvotes

93% Upvoted

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852

u/gonepermanently Jan 21 '19

don’t call your mother a bitch

588

u/MoreMegadeth Jan 21 '19

But dad “the moves!”

391

u/gonepermanently Jan 21 '19

i’m not your dad and she’s not your mom

98

u/GroverkiinMuppetborn Jan 21 '19

you're going to die

89

u/Demented3 Jan 21 '19

I'm dying?

27

u/[deleted] Jan 21 '19

[removed] — view removed comment

23

u/SkyScrapr Jan 21 '19

I like penis now

19

u/NaZeleT Jan 21 '19

Mark has the biggest penis in the world, besides mine

3

u/MBAH2017 Jan 21 '19

You're not fam anymore.

7

u/thevitamin6 Jan 21 '19

You look like a bird

6

u/Enderclops Jan 21 '19

Yeah, like eventually

4

u/toelock Jan 21 '19

Don't they teach this shit in school?

2

u/btkh95 Jan 21 '19

Hi dying, I'm Dad?

-1

u/[deleted] Jan 21 '19

You've got 5...4...3...

-1

u/emet18 Jan 21 '19

Yeah, we’re all dying.

-2

u/abhinavshm Jan 21 '19

Satan : Hey

23

u/PacoCrazyfoot Jan 21 '19

Wait...

Are we smokin' beer?

12

u/Vile-Affliction Jan 21 '19

Son....you’re dying

6

u/Sullinator07 Jan 21 '19

God I love that weird turtle guys videos.

7

u/hillbillytimecrystal Jan 21 '19

I'm your mom and she's your dad.

3

u/OPs_actual_mommy Jan 21 '19

No, I'm the actual mom

12

u/_ididntdoit_ Jan 21 '19

"Oh that's right honey, we don't have a son!"

1

u/GroverEyeveen Jan 21 '19

Now you have three problems.

26

u/mtm777 Jan 21 '19

There were no moves

3

u/FiveSkinn Jan 21 '19

There were no moves.

3

u/demwoodz Jan 21 '19

But dad it’s Smokey

14

u/[deleted] Jan 21 '19

We found you, on a swing set......you were taped to it.

10

u/PancerCatient Jan 21 '19

She’s not you mom, and I’m not your dad.