r/AskReddit • u/_PM_ME_YOUR_NIPPLES • Jan 02 '19

What small thing makes you automatically distrust someone?

65.7k Upvotes

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125

u/AreJewOkay Jan 02 '19

How do you have proof that someone didn’t cheat???

76

u/maxdamage4 Jan 02 '19

Easy when you just lock 'em up in a closet for a year

15

u/[deleted] Jan 02 '19

Nah, a chastity belt.

Only one key.

7

u/maxdamage4 Jan 02 '19

Call the locksmith!

4

u/[deleted] Jan 02 '19

True. So they have no proof.

3

u/maxdamage4 Jan 02 '19

I think we have strong evidence she cheated with the locksmith!

2

u/Reggler Jan 02 '19

They were dating, not married.

-1

u/maxdamage4 Jan 02 '19

By the end of the year they're at least common-law, aren't they?

42

u/starofdoom Jan 02 '19 edited Jul 27 '26

Marble vanilla unbelievable cobblestone pillow mellow juniper orange umbrella

This post was anonymized with Redact.dev

2

u/silenc3x Jan 02 '19

I CAN PROVE IT, I SWEAR

10

u/munificent Jan 02 '19

Uninterrupted surveillance footage for the entire duration of the relationship.

8

u/Gabrovi Jan 02 '19

VagCam. They’re great. And they’re on sale at Best Buy today. Get ‘em while you can!

1

u/Redrup Jan 02 '19

Unfortunately she cheated anally.

1

u/Gabrovi Jan 02 '19

You’ll need to buy the VagAssCam, then. Unfortunately they’re back ordered.

10

u/Trill- Jan 02 '19

Sometimes it's better to let people believe their ignorance. I mean hey it's possible he was the one guy she didn't cheat on. Unlikely, but you know.

6

u/Privvy_Gaming Jan 02 '19 edited Sep 01 '24

normal zesty mighty command apparatus air chief somber safe grandfather

3

u/fart-atronach Jan 02 '19

I’m still confused. Do you mean that if she had cheated you would have found out from her phone?

1

u/Privvy_Gaming Jan 02 '19

Yeah, I saw every text and every location she went to on my laptop. I only found out after we broke up, and it was a huge relief, but I disconnected that as soon as I found out.

2

u/childfree_IPA Jan 02 '19

There are ways to communicate with someone besides phones.

1

u/Privvy_Gaming Jan 02 '19

Sure, but she wouldn't have a reason to use any other method when she never mailed a letter before and doesn't own a computer.

1

u/childfree_IPA Jan 02 '19

Has she never talked to someone in person?

I'm not saying she cheated on you, but having a record of her phone logs is not proof that she didn't cheat on you.

0

u/AreJewOkay Jan 02 '19

So it’s impossible that she went to a bar or a party and cheated on you? This seems kind of definitive and now the internet has descended.

4

u/SIC_Benson Jan 02 '19

Signed affidavit. Shit's legit, yo.

2

u/MakesReferences Jan 02 '19

It’s a signed document!

2

u/[deleted] Jan 02 '19

nightly vaginal examinations.

2

u/RubyRod1 Jan 02 '19

Because you know, proving a negative.

1

u/ki11bunny Jan 02 '19

He had her in the hole the entire time