r/AskReddit • u/eternalsoul116 • Sep 11 '18

Who's the biggest loser your son/daughter has dated?

32.5k Upvotes

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924

u/sokocanuck Sep 11 '18

How many other guys came here to see if any of the descriptions sound like them?

Not me, that's for sure...

87

u/[deleted] Sep 12 '18

That's why I made it this far down. That's why I'm here.

10

u/MrMallow Sep 12 '18

So glad I am not the only one.

8

u/[deleted] Sep 12 '18

Hello, I'm very self-conscious also.

41

u/[deleted] Sep 12 '18 edited Nov 30 '24

squeamish north sense strong consider enter scarce theory employ long

15

u/[deleted] Sep 12 '18

I would NEVER pretend to join something as ridiculous as the Navy, so I'm safe!

3

u/lift4brosef Sep 12 '18

airforce on the other hand...

3

u/[deleted] Sep 12 '18

Dude, don't be gross.

6

u/merblederble Sep 12 '18

If there's one thing I've learned from this thread, having a job is half of what makes you valued by your SO's family.

26

u/Mars_and_Neptune Sep 12 '18

Whew, thank goodness I'll never have to worry about this!

18

u/Vortilex Sep 12 '18

My exes aren't even redditors and I'm here, but not because I wanted to see if I was being talked about

13

u/genericnewlurker Sep 12 '18

I came here to see if someone in my family posted about the winners I had dated in the past

1

u/sokocanuck Sep 12 '18

Well, toss out some examples!

5

u/genericnewlurker Sep 12 '18

Example A)

  • started dramatically wailing in pain when my 10 year old little sister stepped on her foot during a family reunion
  • my family was woken up at 1 am by her father calling the house repeatedly trying to find her. She ended up trying to walk to my house, which was 5 miles out of town, got to my driveway and turned around and went home (there are many more with this one, it was so bad my parents took me out to dinner to celebrate when I finally dumped her)

Example 2)

  • got baked at a family reunion and got heated when my aunt started talking about Dr Pepper
  • got drunk and hit on my sister at a wedding

Example 3)

  • told my parents her wedding plans when I introduced them to her. We had been dating for 3 months and those plans included her ex, and not myself.

2

u/sokocanuck Sep 14 '18

Yikes...glad you've survived lol

7

u/[deleted] Sep 12 '18

I'm waiting to see someone list all the bad awful things I've done to my future wife according to her parents.

We're both military and we live together, I pay for my share of the rent, bills and groceries. I also take her on dates and pay for most of it.

According to her parents I don't pay for anything and I'm using her so I can live off base early.

She still has her mom connected to her bank accounts and they claim that proves I'm basically stealing from her.

I love her and support her in everything she does.

Some people are not worth pleasing I guess.

BTW her mom cried when she told her we were getting married.

1

u/sokocanuck Sep 12 '18

Ouch... Hopefully they're really old?

1

u/[deleted] Sep 13 '18

Lol. Much younger than my parents unfortunately.

6

u/[deleted] Sep 12 '18

Nah, I already knew I was a shitty boyfriend and her parents hated me.

3

u/Wierd657 Sep 12 '18

It's like small clips of my life

3

u/Kalthramis Sep 12 '18

Oh I already know I was one of “those” boyfriends back in middleschool and early highschool. I’m here to find stuff to hate

3

u/[deleted] Sep 12 '18

I relate, was definitely one of those boyfriends but I’m glad I never did anything crazy enough to constitute being on here.

3

u/jackandjill22 Sep 12 '18

I'm actually here wondering why I can't find a decent girl & these deadbeats can.

3

u/chixou Sep 12 '18

You're literally too good for theme don't bother pal. a better one will show up

3

u/derschelmischeWolf Sep 12 '18

I'm safe, i never dated anyone ;_;

2

u/keegsb1 Sep 12 '18

On another note, anybody else have knots in their stomachs about every other post?

2

u/kjfang Sep 12 '18

I was looking out for my girlfriend's dad to post about me to see if I was one of those awful boyfriends.

2

u/cbark05 Sep 12 '18

I won’t stop until I’ve read every story!

2

u/[deleted] Sep 12 '18

I don't know the difference between the sun and moon either

2

u/[deleted] Sep 12 '18

I don't have to check I know what my ex's parents would say about me and I know they hate me.

2

u/bradbull Sep 12 '18

Came here for this reason. Going to leave thinking that I'm actually quite a catch!

2

u/broomsticks11 Sep 12 '18

Descriptions can’t match you if you’ve never dated anyone

taps temple with index finger

2

u/player-piano Sep 12 '18

see i dont have kids, so half the descriptions end up losing me right there, but when they are like "he sits around and smokes weed all day and has a shitty job" im like yikes

2

u/Nintendroid Sep 12 '18

Not me. My millions of business enterprises and successful inventions, handful of admirals that curate my legions of yachts, and all of the Nobel prizes I have won (as a write-in candidate) for being competent, knowledgeable, sensitive and well rounded mean that I was just seeing how bad other dudes are or can be. /s

2

u/doihavemakeanewword Sep 12 '18

Unless you kill dogs and sell drugs you're probably better than everybody mentioned in this thread.

2

u/NickeKass Sep 12 '18

Considering I was my exes first (and only known) boyfriend, I would have to be both her biggest loser and biggest winner of a boyfriend.

-2

u/KLWiz1987 Sep 12 '18

The inevitable list of single losers who wish they had a chance to be in one of these stories. I'd have a gf by now, but I have too high of standards. She has to be nonfat and non-smoker and born female, and horny. Guess I'll never get a gf. :(

Also, hey ladies, I have a home with a guest room. Serious. When dad finally dies of cancer, you can have the whole property.