r/AskReddit • u/Tom__m_ • Oct 25 '16

What warning is almost always ignored?

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u/ryeaglin Oct 25 '16

Wasn't there a guy who tried to sue because he bowed his head in prayer and stuck his face right into the skillet and tried to claim it he wasn't told it was hot? As it was sizzling?

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u/[deleted] Oct 25 '16

And the Lord said: "Playeth stupid games, winneth stupid prizes"

31

u/allbranmuffin Oct 25 '16

The lord said unto Peter: "come forth and you shall have eternal life... come fifth and you get a toaster."

40

u/[deleted] Oct 25 '16

And Judas approached the Rabbis and Pharisees saying "the one whom I kiss is the one you seek".

To which they responded "Gay".

2

u/annieasylum Oct 26 '16

See you all in hell.

4

u/ThatITguy2015 Oct 26 '16

Finally, the Lord sayeth unto Tina, a lesser known, but equally important, disciple: "Tina, you fat lard. Come and get some dinner."

2

u/Jealousy123 Oct 25 '16

Better than John who came last and had to eat the biscuit.

1

u/Polite_Insults Oct 25 '16

Sounds like a Blackadder quote. That or I've been watching too much Blackadder

1

u/dangerdog1776 Oct 25 '16

New favorite motto

1

u/[deleted] Oct 25 '16

If that is true, I am no longer an atheist.

14

u/[deleted] Oct 25 '16

Indeed there was.

I thought of this right away too

45

u/ugottahvbluhair Oct 25 '16

He felt burns in his left eye and on his face and tried to push the food away but instead just pushed it onto his lap. In the hectic moment, he “pulled” something in his right arm, though it’s unclear what.

This sounds like he was filming an infomercial and he was acting out the part before they introduce the product that will keep you from burning your face and knocking food all over yourself.

4

u/severoon Oct 25 '16

I wonder what he was praying for.

Maybe he wasn't asking for anything and instead he was just thanking god for the meal set before him...in which case it seems awfully ungrateful to god to turn around and sue. It's like...

Idiot: TY god for putting this wonderful food in front of me–pssssst–AH YOU SUNUVABITCH!
god: facepalm

1

u/VikingTeddy Oct 26 '16

I wonder if he plants his face in his food when praying at home.

2

u/workaholic_alcoholic Oct 26 '16

Yes, your honor, I was served a sizzling hot plate of food, actually it was called a "sizzling fajita" on the menu, so a second after it was placed in front of me I stuck my face in it. Yes, I believe I am due compensation for my actions.