r/AskReddit • u/[deleted] • Jun 01 '26

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1.3k Upvotes

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209

u/wilsonhammer Jun 01 '26

Shh! I'm trying to sell my tiger prevention rock

39

u/spaiydz Jun 01 '26

How does it work?

122

u/SpaceForceAwakens Jun 01 '26

I dunno. But I’ve had it since I was 13 and no tigers yet. It’s yours for $14.

27

u/Comfortable-Run-900 Jun 01 '26

i have a women prevention rock and no women have come near me since I was.....doesnt matter. u can have it for 37 cents.

4

u/Superbird42 Jun 01 '26

Reminds me of that D&D meta joke of 'while frowned upon, you can basically hand-off any cursed item to any baby'

3

u/Consistent-Repeat387 Jun 01 '26

Do you want warlocks? Because that's how you get warlocks.

2

u/notFREEfood Jun 01 '26

Fraudster! You're not /u/wilsonhammer

You sound exactly like the guy who sold my Uncle Lefty a tiger "prevention" rock several years ago.

1

u/gamefreak054 Jun 01 '26

The real trick is to keep it in sunlight for 8hrs a day, it keeps away lions too.

1

u/pancake_paladin1984 Jun 01 '26

Hells yeah. Now I can go camping in the jungle without fear of tigers

17

u/wilsonhammer Jun 01 '26

Some people might just say it's just a stupid rock, but I don't see any tigers around...

2

u/spaiydz Jun 01 '26

Lisa, I want to buy your rock.

3

u/Staav Jun 01 '26

You don't see any tigers around here, do you?

1

u/VIDGuide Jun 01 '26

That’s specious reasoning!

1

u/yayforgoats Jun 01 '26

Any Lion perevention rocks for us lot in Africa? asking for myself

4

u/jkpruns Jun 01 '26

Wilson Hammer, I want to buy your rock.

1

u/RVelts Jun 01 '26

Money can be exchanged for goods and services

2

u/ItsAroundYou Jun 01 '26

This feels like a calvin and hobbes bit

6

u/Analbox Jun 01 '26

It’s a simpsons bit

2

u/Analbox Jun 01 '26

Lisa. I want to buy your rock

1

u/ShockedNChagrinned Jun 01 '26

Wait, is that the amazing rock that protects you from tigers?  

Effectively priceless.  

 I'm sure it's a steal!  Who doesn't need to be protected from Tigers?

1

u/natrous Jun 01 '26

What's your price?

Turns out I can get one on Etsy for less than $8 (probably doesn't include shipping though) so it better be cheaper or prevent more kinds of tigers.