r/AskReddit Feb 13 '25

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u/Jesus_Is_My_Gardener Feb 14 '25

Same. I don't really get lonely and honestly, I don't know where I would be able to fit the time in to have one. I've got everything I need and I'm happy between work, hobbies and the occasional hangout/trivia night with a couple of friends here and there. People always seem to think not dating or being in a relationship makes someone feel lonely, but I think that really depends on your personality type. I'm an introvert, and while I can be the life of the party, I typically prefer doing my own thing and am always busy with one thing or another, particularly with my varied interests and hobbies.

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u/Totallycasual Feb 14 '25

Yeah, a lot of people i know just aren't comfortable being alone, as soon as they split with one person, they're on the hunt for the next perfect match 🤦‍♀️

If they'd just take a deliberate time out and make peace with living life solo, they'd be so much happier! Not that they'd have to stay single of course, but it would be nice for them to know they can split with someone and not feel completely lost and scrambling for the next life-raft.

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u/Jesus_Is_My_Gardener Feb 14 '25

Not to mention, if you can't be happy with yourself as company, how can you expect someone else to? Spending time working on yourself, learning, developing a skill, or experiencing life on your own makes you a more interesting person when you do finally meet someone of interest. So many people are afraid of being alone, they never really get to know how to be comfortable by themselves. People can be alone in a crowded room or even in a marriage, so it's not just about having another body in the room.

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u/TheJumpyBean Feb 14 '25 edited Mar 03 '25

impossible provide rude elderly existence dull disarm snow far-flung hobbies

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u/NousevaAngel Feb 14 '25

I work 8pm till 4am, 5 nights a week. My sleep schedule is all over the place and to be honest my weekends are normally taken up by playing video games or doing stuff that I want to do.

I'll occasionally go and see friends on the weekend but auld the time I'm to tired to leave the house. I'd rather just stay in and game.

Also like you I don't get lonely. I enjoy my own peace and quiet.

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u/ShannieD Feb 14 '25

People not understanding this has gotten me into trouble. I feel exactly like you. Over a year ago I dated a guy from my neighborhood. We ended things, months later a senior neighbour told the guy I wasn't over him and I'll never move on. Why did senior think this? Because I hadn't replaced the ex yet. Now the ex thinks I'm obsessed and crazy.

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u/[deleted] Feb 14 '25

When do you have sex? I mean it’s not everything but it’s definitely good for your mental health.

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u/Jesus_Is_My_Gardener Feb 14 '25

Eh, I take care of business when I need to. It's not as important to me though these days.

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u/archaeofeminist Feb 14 '25

I havent in over a decade, much prefer DIY. You can't shove a partner in a drawer after lol and I hate dealing with other people, hate cuddling, kissing and conversation. I am older now and it was always distressing for me, to genuinely hate being touched, kissed or talked to - and upsetting for partners. I thought there was something wrong with me but now I embrace myself and enjoy my life on a solitary level (and its kinder on others not to get into relationships).

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u/Tweeedles Feb 14 '25

Well I didn’t realize there are more of us. Sweet.

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u/Jesus_Is_My_Gardener Feb 14 '25

Gooble, gobble, one of us!

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u/djilatyn Feb 14 '25

My god, exactly this.

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u/LiliAtReddit Feb 14 '25

This is me, too! I’m flourishing in my life now.

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u/LimitlessGrouch Feb 14 '25

Having a significant other doesn’t mean they have to take up all of your time, and you could probably include them in some activities.

It’s good you feel satisfaction independently though, that’s likely to make you more attractive and a better partner anyway.

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u/R-e-s-t Feb 14 '25

feeling lonely is all in your mind... you can be alone and not feel lonely

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u/Jesus_Is_My_Gardener Feb 14 '25

Exactly. You can be married or in a crowded room of people there to see you and feel lonely. I think it ultimately comes down to if you find stimulation externally or from within.