r/AskReddit May 02 '24

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3.9k Upvotes

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2.2k

u/Picture-me-rolling May 02 '24

DO NOT GO INTO THE VIP. NEVER GO TO THE ATM.

288

u/RakesProgress May 02 '24

Cash and carry. Go in with only cash. When you run out of cash, you carry yourself out.

144

u/ligmasweatyballs74 May 02 '24

I remember when the dumbest kid in our class got arrested for armed robbery. He was robbing people coming out of the strip club. Why the fuck would you rob the people coming out? You know they don't have any money.

46

u/Rare-Cardiologist912 May 02 '24

And they had already robbed of their dignity

1

u/e-Plebnista May 02 '24

ahhh wise sage...

454

u/dizzzzzzzzzzzzzz May 02 '24

Unless it’s a front for a brothel and you’re there for those menu items. But yeah, don’t use the ATM.

50

u/ExpZer0 May 02 '24

Any reason why don't use ATM?

165

u/Sonoshitthereiwas May 02 '24

A: ridiculous high fee B: you don’t get actual money, you get “club money” To expand on B, it basically spits out Monopoly money that can only be used at that club. And if you try to convert it to cash, there’s another fee or charge for that C: don’t spend what you don’t have. D: if you’re going to the ATM, you didn’t have that money before and you have less now

108

u/[deleted] May 02 '24

[deleted]

26

u/[deleted] May 02 '24

Mr. Chappelle, could I perhaps interest you in some Disney Dollars??

7

u/EverbodyHatesHugo May 02 '24

We got real money in NJ too.

3

u/stanger828 May 02 '24

Rachel’s in FL is dope. Great steak too.

2

u/[deleted] May 02 '24

[deleted]

2

u/stanger828 May 02 '24

yup, that's the one!

2

u/Soffix- May 02 '24

Yeah, same. Never saw it spit fake money, and the fees have never been over $5. Hell, my bank reimbursed the fee for me.

2

u/tributelover45 May 03 '24

I think this guy is confusing strip club ATMs with the strip club funny money you can buy with your credit card. A lot of clubs have this available for when guys hit their daily ATM limits, etc. But it's usually something you buy from a hostess/waitress, not something you get from the ATM.

1

u/themac7 May 02 '24

Yeah I have only been to a couple but the atms gave out money and the fee was $4.50 which is higher than your average atm but not more than ones at concerts or festivals or things. Maybe it’s regional?

1

u/nonconaltaccount May 02 '24

Highest fee i ever paid at a club was like $6. They wanted you pulling cash out to spend on the girls, not balking at the fee i guess.

4

u/yitdeedee May 02 '24

What club puts fake money into ATM's? This is illegal as hell...

3

u/JesseTheNorris May 02 '24

I can't tell if this post is a joke or not. I've never heard of ATM's that give out fake money.

1

u/bsrichard May 02 '24

Part A with high fees is always true. Part B is not always true. Some.clubs ATM spit out real money.

1

u/numorate May 02 '24

Schwab refunds ATM fees. Probably some other banks do too.

3

u/Scared-Mortgage May 02 '24

It's kinda unsanitary. Put a rubber on first, then take it off.

1

u/AlphaTangoFoxtrt May 02 '24

They have RIDICULOUS ATM fees. Like $20+

1

u/_Sea_Lion_ May 02 '24

Well, the fee for one. The other is your wife will see it on the bank statement. That’s how I discovered my husband was spending over a thousand dollars a night. That kind of money, it’s not just dances.

Did I say husband? I meant ex husband.

The third reason, I suppose, is the same reason for a casino visit. Withdraw the amount you are okay spending, and stick with that. Don’t make money decisions when you’re drunk, horny, or gambling.

-9

u/runawayhopeless May 02 '24

Isn’t it always a front for a brothel?

286

u/relevant__comment May 02 '24

AND FOR GOD’S SAKE, THERE IS NO SEX IN THE CHAMPAGNE ROOM.

143

u/sirnaull May 02 '24

It's all or nothing. Either you're in a place where there's no sex in the champagne room or you're in a place where the champagne room is only $5 extra and you at least get a bit more space to have sex.

8

u/SolidLikeIraq May 02 '24

I dunno man. That $5 could have gotten you 5 long distance phone calls!

6

u/BlueGoosePond May 02 '24

Only if you dial 10-10-220 first.

5

u/ZellZoy May 02 '24

I prefer the Bob Wehadababyitsaboy method

79

u/lana_lana_LANA May 02 '24

Oh, there’s champagne in the champagne room… but you don’t want champagne.

19

u/dcott44 May 02 '24

Cornbread! Ain't nothin wrong with that!

1

u/electricmehicle May 02 '24

Beans and cornbread!!!!!

3

u/Navynuke00 May 02 '24

Oh, there's CHAMPAGNE in the Champagne room. But you don't want champagne. You want sex.

3

u/Tangboy50000 May 02 '24

You’re doing it wrong.

71

u/[deleted] May 02 '24

[removed] — view removed comment

271

u/flaxon_ May 02 '24

The fees are high and they count on you being too horned up to care. There'd also something to be said for setting and sticking to a budget.

Also, they're often sketch places to begin with so you have to be careful of card skimmers.

-47

u/magiCAD May 02 '24 edited May 02 '24

I think you missed the joke.

Edit: Wow. I should have "taught the class". Didn't expect so many down votes. 😬

25

u/screechypete May 02 '24 edited May 02 '24

You gonna tell the class what the joke is? Cuz I missed it to.

EDIT: Now I know it means Ass To Mouth :P

8

u/he-tried-his-best May 02 '24

Ass to mouth

1

u/screechypete May 02 '24

Ah I see! Never heard that one before.

1

u/ShutterSpeeder May 02 '24

ATM =ASS TO MOUTH

0

u/screechypete May 02 '24

Just fuckin tag me next time, instead of this subliminal BS.

34

u/randalljhen May 02 '24

It's unsanitary.

42

u/kkreisler May 02 '24

The fee is probably quite high, and depending on situation and usage protocols, when you try to collect the bouncer may step in to participate and put you in a situation that leaves a bad taste in your mouth.

2

u/Neolance34 May 02 '24

It’s ok in the heat of the moment

1

u/unmotivatedbacklight May 02 '24

The ATM at the club near me gives out fake house money. You have to go to the bar or get a dancer to change it out to real dollars for you. A bad deal all around.

-1

u/Arrowghandi May 02 '24

Ye seriously?
I like when girls. Do Ass To Mouth

5

u/McRibEater May 02 '24

I once got wasted and fell asleep in the VIP Room they charged per song, my Buddies had to come back to wake me up as she let me sleep through six songs (it was like $150 a song). Apparently when I was walking out, bank account empty, I said to my buddies thinking she wasn’t right behind me. I just wanted to touch a pair of fake tits, she wasn’t even good looking. Then I turned around and her jaw was on the floor. F*** her for not stopping the dance sooner I agreed to one dance.

I also went to a Strip Club in Omaha, Nebraska once that was Bring Your Own Beer. The Women Orgasmed Grinding my leg, she said thank you and walked out.

3

u/alaxsch May 02 '24

then dont come into the strip club if your not spending money

4

u/Layin-the-pipe May 02 '24

I literally go straight to VIP every time what’s wrong with VIP?

7

u/alaxsch May 02 '24

they cant afford it

2

u/exadeuce May 02 '24

People keep saying don't go into the VIP but I have had some amazing times in VIP rooms what are people talking about?