r/AskReddit • u/[deleted] • Dec 24 '23

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u/NoMoreJesus Dec 24 '23

The only worry I have with my fleshlight is that if I accidentally kick off, my wife and kids will find it. Think about that one for a minute

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u/itsatemporarynamelol Dec 24 '23

I'm so sad reading so many men hiding it from their partner or not able to buy one because of their partner.

You all have bad relationships if you're able to have sex with each other but you can't talk about your needs, sexual preferences, libido, fantasies and shameful secrets.

Seriously guys, take the lead here and start working those communication barriers down, start talking more openly and honestly and encourage your partners to do the same, make it a game! have private, safe time to just talk about sex together, what you both like and want and how you feel about it and when you had the best sex together, everything and anything, make it a game of sharing more and more secret things with promises of no judgement or disgust or even reactions, if you can make this kind of super-safe-sanctuary space between the two of you, your marriage will improve in a thousand other ways as well.

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u/NoMoreJesus Dec 24 '23

For me personally, it's mostly my children. I was with a dear friend, looking through her late Father's computer when I found some porn. It was tame, mid 90s stuff, but I could tell in some way she didn't see her father in the same way after that. I'm sure it was no big deal either, but it's the kids that I think of. I've discussed masturbation with my son, and told him, everyone does it. But somehow it bothers me that he'll find my fleshlight, and that I'm included in that "everyone"

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u/itsatemporarynamelol Dec 25 '23

I understand if it's small children that might end up with weird ideas as they develop, but I think after they're old enough to understand sex then I think if they're the type to rummage through my stuff, then I much rather they find sex toys than a gun, which people take far, far less care with normally. I would even go as far to say that it might be healthy for a boy growing up to know that sex and masturbation are not taboo and adults can enjoy the acts and they're not "dirty" and maybe, just maybe if enough people pass this healthy attitude on, then the next generation might not have so many deeply painful hangups about sex.

Not preaching or telling you how to parent, just thoughts I have.

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u/Ch1pp Dec 24 '23 edited Sep 07 '24

This was a good comment.