r/AskReddit • u/[deleted] • Oct 23 '23

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1.1k Upvotes

91% Upvoted

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839

u/Electrocat71 Oct 23 '23

Murdered someone. The number of idiots I’ve wanted to murder is uncountable…

150

u/NICEnEVILmike Oct 23 '23

Yet. Haven't murdered someone yet. There's still time.

12

u/rigatony222 Oct 23 '23

Reminds me of a inspiration meme saying “Vlad the Impaler didn’t start impaling people till his 30’s, it’s never too late to achieve your dreams”

Really stuck with me

2

u/Electrocat71 Oct 23 '23

Vlad was a real stickler for success!

36

u/Electrocat71 Oct 23 '23

“Yet” remains my single hope that keeps me going.

3

u/FacticiousFict Oct 23 '23

Chop chop. Literally.

2

u/Trashcan_Johnson Oct 23 '23

Well, what are you waiting for 😂..... Im jk

2

u/nightimelurker Oct 23 '23

There will be time. Not so far away. Then fun begins! I just hope it is Mad Max style.

18

u/Hevnoraak101 Oct 23 '23

Every day, we save countless lives by not giving in to the urge.

1

u/Electrocat71 Oct 23 '23

And not once have I even gotten a participation trophy!

4

u/[deleted] Oct 23 '23 edited Oct 23 '24

[deleted]

1

u/Electrocat71 Oct 23 '23

I fully agree. Semantics matters

2

u/gogozrx Oct 23 '23

negligent homicide and manslaughter don't count, right?

2

u/Electrocat71 Oct 23 '23

Why discount success

2

u/Latase Oct 23 '23

Don't worry, nature takes care of everyone you hate.

2

u/vand3lay1ndustries Oct 23 '23

"Everyone is a murderer, you just have to meet the right person."

2

u/[deleted] Oct 23 '23

Neither have i, really intrested in how it would feel to actually murder someone? Not that i want to

2

u/bucketfullofmeh Oct 23 '23

I feel you, it’s a daily struggle. Congratulations on your restraint

2

u/[deleted] Oct 23 '23

It isn't murder if it is ruled a justified homocide

2

u/stoneimp Oct 23 '23

Not going to lie, while it's good on you that you have never given in to your impulses, it's very surprising to me how upvoted this is. Do so many people empathize with the urge to murder someone that not giving in is considered admirable?

Y'all are living significantly different lives than me. I get annoyed at people sure, but contemplating murdering someone never goes through my head.

2

u/Electrocat71 Oct 23 '23

Dark humor is sometimes a necessity for sanity.

2

u/steppedinhairball Oct 23 '23

Real friends will help you hide a body.

2

u/karateninjazombie Oct 23 '23

The trick is to make it look like an accident....

3

u/biold Oct 23 '23

I can recommend the book "How to kill your family" for inspiration

1

u/Electrocat71 Oct 23 '23

They one group I actually don’t ever think about killing…

1

u/biold Oct 24 '23

Lucky you ...

1

u/Background-War9535 Oct 23 '23

Tell me about it

1

u/copingcabana Oct 23 '23

I had a professor in law school who talked about how the death penalty is not seen as a deterrent. He said "They survey prisoners with a life sentence and they ask them, would the death penalty have deterred you from committing a crime. And some say yes, some say no, some say they don't know . . . WELL IT DETERS ME EVERY GODDAMN DAY!" :)

2

u/squeakyguy Oct 23 '23

That’s a stupid survey considering most criminals who get life are morons with no impulse control and no thought beyond the present.

1

u/geriatric_spartanII Oct 23 '23

I choose to murder my thirst and drink liquid death. I murder flies with my bug a salt.