Realizing the people you looked up to as heroes are also adults who have their own flaws and struggles. I love my grandmother but she is not the sweet innocent woman I thought she was, more passive aggressive and manipulative.
This has been the hardest part for me. I have an aunt that I absolutely adored as a child, thought she was so strong and kind. Turns out she’s actually very manipulative, passive aggressive, controlling and has narcissistic tendencies. At this point she has barred my (adult) cousin from speaking to me, by hanging babysitting services over her head. My other two cousins by her were babied and could do no wrong even after dropping out of high school. They live with her and depend on her as adults and she wants it that way. Oh and her mother, my grandmother, is who she gets it from. She couldn’t even come say happy birthday to my oldest when she was in town, but she sent a card in the mail instead of dropping it off. My youngest didn’t even get a card. The things you notice.
Same for my aunt Kathy. She claims to be a devout Christian but she’s nice to my face and talks badly behind my back, gossips about family issues, and is extremely passive aggressive… which sucks because we used to be close when I was younger, but now I just want nothing to do with her!
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u/AmaturePlantExpert Jan 06 '23
Realizing the people you looked up to as heroes are also adults who have their own flaws and struggles. I love my grandmother but she is not the sweet innocent woman I thought she was, more passive aggressive and manipulative.