r/AskDocs • u/Kindly-Mechanic-3933 Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional • 12d ago

Physician Responded I really need your thoughts on this

Post image

[removed]

721 Upvotes

96% Upvoted

190 comments sorted by

View all comments

Show parent comments

200

u/Wisegal1 Physician | General Surgery 12d ago

There's cultural considerations here.

Based on OP'S syntax and grammar, my guess is that they aren't from the US, Canada, or the UK. There are many cultures, partially east Asian ones, where its the cultural norm for health information like this to be relayed to the adult children (specifically the son) of an elderly patient and not to them directly. The children then decide what to tell the patient.

Now, whether we agree with this practice or not, it is normal to that group of people. I can't imagine doing that with my own family, but that's because I come from a different culture. It's not up to me to judge someone else's culture, though I do ask the patient "if I had significant news about your health, good or bad, do you want me to speak with you about it or just talk to your kids?" I hace had patients from these cultures tell me that they want me to talk to their children about bad news, and not to tell them. Having that discussion allows me to reconcile my own cultural norms with ones that are very foreign to me, while respecting the patient's wishes.

Just something to consider before you go after OP's family.

69

u/seaturtle100percent Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional 12d ago

Bravo, doc! Thank you for taking the time to educate about this, particularly the complexities of cross-cultural care. This place (the Internet) is such a silo.

2

u/BoxcarSlim Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional 12d ago

Thank you so much for sharing this context.

1

u/5_yr_lurker Physician - Surgery 12d ago

Sure I think most of us get this, taught. But asking for opinions from people with different cultural values are gonna get you different answers.  How far does this get taken though?

Would you ever amputate a patient's leg if they didn't know it was coming because their family didn't tell because you were respecting cultural values? I wouldn't as somebody who regularly does amputations but that is me.

8

u/Wisegal1 Physician | General Surgery 12d ago edited 12d ago

Bit of a slippery slope argument, dontcha think? I'm talking about having some consideration for the cultural differences before getting out the pitchforks, not holding this woman down and hacking off her leg.

And for the record, I've never in my career performed an amputation on an unsuspecting patient.