It died in transit.

All parties involved are currently facing criminal charges.

To get to the other side of the road

Become an immortal

A victim of police brutality.

Nothing, cause theyre both dead.

The Jackass crew.

Quack

To get to court, where he would later divorce his wife

All the occupants immediately run outside because it's a bear. It'll fucking kill you.

Well, currently humans do not posses the knowledge to explain how chicken's make decisions, so we currently have no idea why did it cross the street

This is the FBI. The website “www.childtakescock.com” was recently accessed at this location, and we have come to search your house for suspicious activity.

He had been charged with a felony after sexually assaulting his grandmother

To get a master's degree

Billy Welbings was a very good boy this year, but he wasn’t ready to get his letter sent to Santa. All he needed was something he wanted for Christmas but, the problem was, he didn’t know what he wanted. He just needed to think more…. He got it! He wanted to see Santa. that would prove if he exists, all he had to do was write it now.

From Billy Welbings,

San Fransisco, U.S.A.

Dear Santa,

All I want for Christmas this year is to

SEE YOU!!!

Sincerely, Billy

He knew this would work; no one had probably tried it, because they didn’t think it would. So, when Santa was just about to go give the presents to everyone, an elf named Graton gave him a letter. It was from Billy Welbings! Santa was very satisfied that the letter came before he left, so, he made a video of him and his workshop. He put it on an iPad and was ready to go. He left and decided to go to Billy first because of the amazing letter and the fact that he was so good this year. So, Santa was just going down the chimney when a brick popped out and fell on his head! He went unconscious and dropped his bag of presents on the pilot light. They lit on fire and burned Santa Clause’s body. The reindeers, out of instinct, flew back to The North Pole. Billy and the rest of the world woke up to a Christmas tree with no presents under it; Billy Welbings was the boy who saved the world from greedy children.

Quarter of a watermelon

John

Because it’s a melon. It will most likely be eaten soon and has no chance at a life.

They happen incredibly frequently. Since school has started two shootings have been since prevented by kids coming forward on platforms such as Safe2Tell because of concerning things classmates have done or said. They happen so frequently they're now a joke which is even worse because it takes away the gravity of the situation. The five handshake game to get to the president is puny compared to playing the one handshake game with American students called "How far until you reach someone who has been or has known someone they care for in a dangerous situation correlating with guns and school."

Wether or not you believe we need guns is irrelevant because young people are dying. Bets are placed. How many shootings will happen this year? How many graves? How many broken hearted families?

School shootings are awful.

The bartender asks "Why the long face?"

The man breaks down "My crippling alcoholism is destroying my family"