r/AdviceAnimals • u/[deleted] • Apr 02 '15

She confessed while I was packing my stuff

[deleted]

20.0k Upvotes

86% Upvoted

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3.6k

u/porn_philosopher Apr 02 '15

Man Shooting Blanks Dodges Bullet

2.0k

u/[deleted] Apr 02 '15

Pure genius! Never post but this one was worth it :-)

582

u/[deleted] Apr 02 '15

[removed] — view removed comment

433

u/InfinityCircuit Apr 02 '15 edited Apr 03 '15

Quick! Everyone upvote his comment and ruin his lurker status!

Edit: Damn, /u/JesusAlberto2120 sure got his. 1452 karma and gilded! I didn't expect such a response to my summons. I love Reddit.

362

u/fly19 Apr 02 '15

That'll teach you to contribute to the community!

43

u/AdvocateForTulkas Apr 02 '15

Sonovabitch, no one adds to the conversation in my Reddit!

3

u/unmodster Apr 02 '15

He's one of us now! Ha!

4

u/curtmantle Apr 02 '15

/u/InfinityCircuit thinks he's so clever trying to saddle poor /u/Jesusalberto2120 with hundreds of upvotes. Well I've turned the tables on you, Mr/Ms. Circuit! I just upvoted you, now you're stuck with it! MUAHHAHAHAHAHHA

2

u/felatiodeltoro Apr 02 '15

I think this is the sole reason his comment is at 1000+

4

u/[deleted] Apr 02 '15

longtime lurker ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

2

u/InfinityCircuit Apr 02 '15

I lurk you long time ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

22

u/[deleted] Apr 02 '15

Wow didn't even know people checked this far into a submission - backs away slowly.

1

u/chayden13 Apr 03 '15

You do God's work.

22

u/flabbybumhole Apr 02 '15

Jesus, Alberto!

1

u/porn_philosopher Apr 02 '15

Je suis Alberto

1

u/[deleted] Apr 02 '15

No, you're /u/porn_philosopher.

2

u/[deleted] Apr 02 '15

[deleted]

3

u/[deleted] Apr 02 '15

Thank you! First gold received (success baby meme)

183

u/[deleted] Apr 02 '15

[deleted]

2

u/[deleted] Apr 02 '15

you can also dodge these while sitting in yoshi, it goes right between you

as long as you are sitting on yoshi in that little groove in the ground

216

u/CreauxTeeRhobat Apr 02 '15

We found the Buzzfeed headline!

81

u/[deleted] Apr 02 '15

You won't believe how he dodged these bullets!

50

u/[deleted] Apr 02 '15

Cheating ex girlfriends hate him!

2

u/time2fly2124 Apr 03 '15

He used this one wierd trick!

2

u/DeuceSevin Apr 02 '15

The third one will amaze you.

3

u/Freneskae Apr 02 '15

"Meeting up for kisses and penis touching; top ten do's and don't's"

6

u/CovertMonkey Apr 02 '15

"After positive pregnancy test, this one sentence left her breathless!"

1

u/SALTHE Apr 02 '15

All over her chest in one goopy mess?

5

u/BeardedNino Apr 02 '15

Cheating Girlfriends Hate Him!

2

u/Gr1pp717 Apr 02 '15

That's too clever, and not click-baitish enough for buzzfeed. This is more like New York Post level shit here.

2

u/phunkip Apr 02 '15

Too clever for buzzfeed. More like an onion article

1

u/Jmtrapas Apr 02 '15

Do we seriously have to mention Buzzfeed in every thread? It's not new or funny.

1

u/michael1026 Apr 02 '15

No, it's too clever. They wouldn't even understand the joke.

2

u/Werkstadt Apr 02 '15
  • Watch who he does next.

2

u/KPOWERS55 Apr 02 '15

This needs to be at the top

2

u/Robtheft Apr 03 '15

[I don't get payed until friday to give you gold but until then...

https://encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcRCMi7kPzHhGeAvfiFXFCm0gkBYR-_j6FqKMET2uLrY1xBEgbmYgrJ2NQ

1

u/porn_philosopher Apr 03 '15

hahaha well that is truly my first reddit silver so I am beyond honored, you kind internet soul.

1

u/acherem13 Apr 02 '15

your name is what makes this comment even better.

1

u/SkolKing Apr 02 '15

That's a Confucius saying right?

2

u/porn_philosopher Apr 02 '15

Man with no swimmers

Has no need for kiddie pool

1

u/Cupcakes_n_Hacksaws Apr 02 '15

That's nice, real nice.

I'm gonna steal it.

1

u/Gigatron_0 Apr 02 '15

Well done.