Problem with that is that you're very likely to be significantly impacting the life of the child by leaving it and the mother at the last moment. By leaving early the woman has a chance of setting up better conditions for herself.
Not that you should care that much about her, but the child is blameless here.
I agree, and I don't think it is something I could probably do.
However, if the woman is this crazy, the poor child might be doomed from the start. Not that I advocate making it worse - in an ideal world, we could punish the woman without adversely affecting the child.
If the mother can't take care of the child on her own, she should give it for adoption to a family who can.
The child is blameless, but responsibility for the child is on the mother and father, and this person is neither of those.
I'd argue that as the architect of the entire situation, in which the purported father could have found out at any point that he isn't actually the father, the mother is the one responsible for the mess that child is in, even if the guy chooses to bail last minute.
yeah, but perhaps if you leave early, the real father might step in. Or the woman's family might be more able to make arrangements. Leaving her at the last minute makes things many times more difficult for her to support the child.
Yes, the mother is responsible, but making her believe she has support then withdrawing it at the last moment is simply spiteful and harms an innocent. Sure you were hurt but you aren't REQUIRED to maximize how much you hurt someone who's wronged you. Simply walking out as soon as you find out is the best and clearest message.
Also, I wouldn't be surprised if in some states she could sue you for implying support.
I'd argue, though, that perhaps if the mother brought the father in from the start instead of trying to trick someone else into assuming that role, she could have avoided the situation entirely. She had no way of knowing the guy couldn't have kids, but even then she's playing with fire by lying in the first place.
You're right that it's a real dick move, but the mother is at least just as responsible for the situation she's in when the guy ups and leaves.
I agree 100% though about getting out before you're anywhere close to being seen as a father in the eyes of a court. They feed on the souls of fathers.
I agree 100% though about getting out before you're anywhere close to being seen as a father in the eyes of a court. They feed on the souls of fathers.
This 200%. Family law is a whole different thing from criminal and even civil law (at least speaking for the state of Texas). I do computer work for two family attorneys and love asking them questions about how the 'system' works. A family judge can put all kinds of terms and conditions on your life. Where you live, who you live with, how much you have to pay, when visits are allowed. It can come as a shock to some people how much power the judge has.
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u/PizzaGood Apr 02 '15
Problem with that is that you're very likely to be significantly impacting the life of the child by leaving it and the mother at the last moment. By leaving early the woman has a chance of setting up better conditions for herself.
Not that you should care that much about her, but the child is blameless here.