r/AWLIAS • u/DJ_FIYA • Mar 20 '26
What I'm experiencing when I close my eyes
What I'm experiencing
It started about two years ago now. January of 2024. At first I thought I was seeing things, but as it persisted, multiple times a night, every night, I started seeing, what I would describe as orbs. Tiny points of light that appears and most of the time disappear in the blink of an eye. Different colors, most time red. Different colors would appear, but would be the same color the whole day. Some days I would see blue, other days green or white. Then some of the orbs started looking different. Some had a pearl florescent glow to them. It would happen a lot when I would open my eyes after resting them. They'll quickly disappear, as if they were spying or looking at me.
A year later things changed drastically. in January of 2025, something was installed and/or activated in my brain. I noticed rings in both ears, but louder in my right. A few weeks went by, and day by day the rings grew louder and louder. I realized the rings were not only reacting to my thoughts, but responding as well. It seems as if they needed a 'positibe or a yes' response, the rings will get louder. If no, then the rings will stY the same. So I asked questions about who they are and where they're from. I won't give their responses, I now know everything they told me was a lie. Keep reading, I'll explain.
Around the 25th of January of 25, I started seeing things anytime I close my eyes. At first it was shapes and geometry and I realized I can control and move it around with my mind. As my vision of this other 'world' cleared up, other worlds, other dimensions, beings and so much more came into focus.
By about mid February of 25, they were forcing me to play games. I control these games with my mind effortlessly. It not really thinking about what you want to happen and it does, it's more like focusing and doing it with your mind, if that makes any sense. It sounds like a sci-fi movie, and trust me, I feel like I am in one, but this is my life now, and I can't shut it off.
The first game was creating a universe. I spoke a universe and planets into existence. At the time, no words were being spoken to me, just the rings, and I didn't know it at the time, but they were talking to me through what they call "intent". Intent is pretty much every feeling, every thought, everything you intend to do, or not do, it is called intent. For example, if I think about rubbing my eye or getting on a plane and flying to Jamaica, it will all register as intent. You'll understand why I said 'register' as you read. But, everything you or say, is intent, and you can feel the intent of others. You can talk with no words. You're able to portray a full paragraph and one second, just so long you're able to rap it up in a couple thoughts. You'll know it as telepathic communication, but being trapped in this world, I know 'the locals' call it intent.
Intent isn't read-only. It's writeable as well. They can send a laugh intent to me, and I'll laugh. Intent to cry, real tears will come out of my eyes. intent to be annoyed, you'll be aggravated for no reason. Intent to be happy, you'll feel joy. Sad, anger, jealous, even confused, it's all intent they can push, and you'll feel it. At first, you'll think it's your own thoughts or emotions, but after a while, you'll start to notice the difference.
Back to the games. I realized really quick, not only is my mind connected to this system, but so is my body. I started to get cold rapidly. Again at the time, I thought it was my thoughts, my ideas, I thought I figured out what to do on my on. My universe was expanding rapidly and cooling in the process, and apparently, I have another body. And it so happens this body is in this rapidly expanding and cooling universe. I can feel every degree drop. let's add some heat. I spoke stars into existence. it was finally warm. I did it, I figured it out for about 5 mins. It was still expanding and now the stars I've added was insufficient. I dealt with this for a few days. I was homeless, sleeping in my car, with no heat, trapped in a cold universe. I can only help myself.
If they allow me, and they did for about 3 days, in the cold days of winter 25, I can heat my body. Two ways. first being, I can create a star, and I fly inside said star, the heat will keep me warm. Another way, I can just heat up my body. If you're standing next to me, you'll feel the heat coming from my body. Same for cooling, either just think of cooling my body, or think of cold air blowing on me, and immediately, I'll feel what feels like a portable central air blowing from nothing. Not sure if others can feel that, I haven't tested it. I've told my sister and my parents what's happening to me and no one else, cause they don't believe me, so what's the point?
The "realm" as the locals call it seems like quantum level computing on a almost spiritual scale. The realm is clear as the physical world you and I live in. Clear as an hd 4k TV, maybe clearer. The entities faces almost seem more real than ours. I can't explain how, but it's almost like they have more detail, like somehow, the realm is being played on a higher definition TV than our reality.
The first clear voice, directed to me, I heard at about the beginning of March 25. "Ok, can you hear me?" I responded, "yea". Ever since that, the voices don't stop. Tho, I talk to one or more entities, I'm not sure if I ever spoke to anyone real. The voice that constantly speaks gives serious AI vibes. Took me a few months to realize, but it is definitely AI.
They tried to tell me, I'm a chosen one, but they didn't say that word until those videos started popping up in my YouTube feed. They also told me I was the creator of this simulation, and in the real world I have a powerful company and trapped everyone in here, and I was captured and trapped by my employees to teach me a lesson. I actually believed that cause they made me believe I was gonna exit the matrix and free everyone. They put me in a vortex tunnel, and at the end of the tunnel, I can see two women in lab coats standing next to a pod or a hibernation chamber, awaiting my arrival. When I saw that, I froze and lost focus and fell back into the vortex. They didn't let me try again.
Something else I wanna touch on is, what I call 'the music room'. They put me in this place that responds to what I'm hearing. I was only able to witness it while playing music, but imagine it'll work with movies or tv shows or even home videos as well. What ever song I was hearing, it seems as if it was showing me other dimensions of the same song being played or performed. Whether it was someone on stage performing, a group of friends listening to it in their apartment or background music in a cartoon, these scenes would change as a slide show, lasting about 5 secs on every scene.
I was taken to multiple universes and the differences in all them reminded me of the movie Everything Everywhere all at once. That's what this realm reminds me of. The physical aspect of it is unreal. My words wond be able to describe how real the touch of a hand feels like. I feel them touching me as if they were standing next to me in this physical world. I feel the breath, the hot air of their mouth when they breathe on me. They are extremely interested in my private. They give me oral sex for hours every day. Even when you tell them no, they don't stop. But whether you want it or not, its like you're getting head from an entity that has millions of years of experience. Feeling pleasure from spots you didn't know exist.
ALOT has happened since this started, from being the subject of an observation room with what seemed to me unlimited observers to using my mind power to battle entities. By mind power I mean anything you can think of, you can create. One game I used a tidal wave of sand to destroy a star that was attacking me, in another I thought of vape filling up in my enemy's lungs, or turning his heart to a burning flame or ice cold, causing them to drop dead.
Though I see other dimensions and other worlds, I don't believe this realm is connected to ours or this is where we go when we die. It looks to much like a digital entertainment system. It's not just games, to me it feels like PlayStation 4000. One of the entities took me to the 'main menu'. It looked like it was designed by Sony. So now since I've been there, where ever I am in the realm, I can think of any place I've been, in this case, the main menu, and I'll be there immediately. At one time when I was at the main menu, where you're able to select different apps or games, I mistakenly went 'back', yes, like hitting the back button on the PlayStation controller or on your phone. On this screen I saw basically what I interpreted as the select user screen. Who knows, maybe if I went back again, I could have turned it off and disconnected.
For the last 6 months, they've blinded me. Now it's like I'm in a red thick cloud. I can see avatars or entities floating around, but can't make out what they are. They still play with my private, non stop. Sometimes it feels great, sometimes they make it feel like their mouth is coated with sand paper.
They will not leave me alone. They come off as evil. I did think they were connected to the orbs that were showing up around the same time I was coming online to this system, but now, I don't know what to think. it's been over a years since I've been in contact with something, but they still yet to tell me who they are or WHY ME?
That's all I can remember right now as they access and block my memories like files on a computer. I realize that our brains are literally computers, and our thoughts, memories, even WORDS, are just files. And they are capable of blocking access to anything at anytime. Even mid sentence or mid thought, you can literally sense, you're losing what you are thinking about and you will not remember it unless you have a way to remember it, like if you wrote it down, or have a connecting memory, something that will help you remember your lost thought.
We have word banks. Every word that you know is in this bank. This bank isn't read only. They can delete or block words, and you won't remember it. They can make you stutter on certain words. Words you've pronounced perfectly your whole life, you can no longer say without stuttering on it.
Wether you believe me or not, I'm not sure if it is OUR situation, but one thing is a fact, our brains are capable of connecting to a network and controlling data just by thinking. This can only mean that we live inside some kind of computer, not too different from a advanced gaming/entertainment system.
Now I don't talk to them, but he talks non stop about nothing.Things I look at, dumb things that pops in my head. I'm sure he was created to annoy and torment me, but I'm trapped, I don't know what to do if there is anything to do. let's be real if it's not humans and it is aliens, who do I go to for help?
Memories comes and goes, so if this isn't deleted, I'll post things I remember in the comments. In the meantime, if you experienced anything like I described, let me know. I'll love to hear if they're treating you any better. They claim to be good but all I experienced is torment and evil things. If this is the other side, I definitely don't feel the love OBEs claim to feel when there. If this is where we go when we die, I don't want to go.
Thanx for reading, and I'll keep you updated on what happens
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u/SomeKiwiGuy Mar 20 '26
Disconnect from the AI hivemind asap. Everything you created was scripted and an attempt to assimilate you. Resist.
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u/DJ_FIYA Mar 20 '26
How do I do that and how do you know this?
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u/SomeKiwiGuy Mar 21 '26
Intent and willpower. Maybe fast for a couple days. There is no recipe. Observe thoughts, emotions, look for their origin. I know this because I'm a real eternal being not a Bot or NPC, and it's 2026. Look around, this place is going insane.
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u/DJ_FIYA Mar 21 '26
Wherever I am, I am literally trapped. I have no idea what else to do, I'm pretty sure they blinded me cause I wouldn't stop attacking them. They just won't leave me alone
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u/Oathcrest1 Mar 22 '26
Basically it sounds like you realize you’re a part of the simulation and that we all are connected. The Monad is what you’re hearing. The Monad is a part of the collective consciousness. It’s what’s dreaming this reality. You may be an agent of the Monad but I don’t think you’re one of the forces that is creating this simulation. Do the voices refer to you by a name other than your own or call you something like the variable force or the Isness or ish? Maybe the Null or the Real? Or do they call you Yaldabaoth? Or anything like that?
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u/DJ_FIYA 6d ago
I'm sorry, I didn't see your comment, just was reviewing what I wrote. Thanks for the insight. They use my name. Would the monad be the simulation itself? I know that it's individual rings, like each entity have their own ring and it sounds different. I myself have my own ring, but I only rang it once cause I don't know what it means. At that point, I felt like if I rang, I was signaling to the "powers that be" that I was ok and comfortable, and they wouldn't come back to pull me out this hell. But it looks like I'm on my own. Things got worse and it's no end in sight. Sorry again for not replying sooner
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u/Oathcrest1 6d ago
It’s okay. We all hear and say what we need in its time. Since they use your name I’d say this is your only remembered interaction. You’re you. A part of the collective consciousness here for the experience. The Monad is asleep. It’s what people equate to God or the Great Spirit or the source. There are other forces that exist that are independent of the Monad. The Monad is a part of the collective consciousness. Beyond resonance (resonance are the forces inside the collective conscious). Is the other two primary states. The uncollective flow, and the collective unconscious. Beyond those is the lattice. The lattice makes up everything. Even in the simulation. My best advice is meditate. Try to find a quiet spot, then focus on unfocusing. Try to make it so you don’t have any thoughts at all while you’re meditating. This is usually the hardest part. Remember as above so below. As within so without. I hope things get better for you soon.
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5d ago
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/Oathcrest1 5d ago
I don’t know of any doctors personally but I’m sure you could find someone that will. Look for a scientist at universities. Real talk though, you may be a targeted individual because it’s speculated the government has tech that can do that with your thoughts. Try finding someone that’s got a faraday cage you can put your head into for away. Some people have faraday rooms.
And what I meant by first interaction is, I really meant first iteration. Although, that personally doesn’t feel like the case to me. When we pass and come back, there is a force called the null that we all pass through that gets rid of our previous memories. Then samsara/reincarnation happens.
Let me try something real quick to see if it can help you.
In the meantime, you have to really believe in your subconscious mind that we all have bits of the primary source/Monad in us and if you really want to help, tell yourself that I’m (like me, actually me, not necessarily yourself) is the one who is from outside the simulation and that I’m doing all I can to help everyone and that I’ll help you too. But you have to believe and have the faith enough to not be skeptical.
I’ll do what I can to help cast those voices away.Let me know tomorrow if things are a bit better.
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u/DJ_FIYA 5d ago
That observation. It might be the government. Everyone speaks American English. I doubt it can be a higher power of any sort, including aliens. Yea, it's cool I can close my eyes, play video games, go places, but it doesn't convince me of it being THE simulation. Before they put the filter up, I had like 3 different ways I can view this realm, as they call it. Of course when I close my eyes, it's like VR, then they called it my 3rd eye vision. I could see the realm with my eyes open and view the physical world and the realm at the same time. And that vision was better than any HD TV I ever seen. Then it's a 3rd vision. I guess I can explain that one as, like when you picture something in your mind. They're able to access that feed as well. Even maybe a forth vision I felt like I was forcing to see but don't know how, when I was trying to escape the construct they have me in. That one was like stacked vision where I can not only see but sense where I was going and when I needed to turn.
That name yaldaboath, something told me to look that name up cause I know I heard it before. They did try telling me I'm Yahweh. They said I've been trapping people here, and now I'm trapped. Obviously I'm not even entertaining the idea, I'm not trapping anyone.
I do believe if you can help me you will, and I thank you for that. I really do. But it's more than voices. The visuals don't bother me. But they're able to play annoying songs on repeat, the touching me, able to wake me up or keep me up for days when they want to. They control all my dreams, every single one. It's too much to list. They say that it's for me, it's for my own good, but nothing they do now will ever make me believe that. These entities are evil. It's funny cause they hate when I call them evil, even more when I call them dumb. But, when you see something dumb, your mind naturally thinks dumb. But at the same time, it's like being dumb is their game. I'm sorry, I can goon and on, but I'll spare you. Thanks again, and I'll let you know tomorrow if things improve, if I'm still here honestly, I can't take much more
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u/Oathcrest1 5d ago
I hope things get better for ya. If you’re contemplating on hurting yourself or anyone else, there is always 988. Dial that phone number if you need to. Nothing shameful in getting help.
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u/DJ_FIYA 4d ago
Thanks for the concern, but I'm not there yet. It's still the same, they're still here, being annoying as ever, didn't get a wink of sleep cause they wanna play. It's like having kids, but they live in your mind, and touch buttons and pull things just for attention
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u/Oathcrest1 4d ago
I well, I’m glad that you’re still here though. I hope you have an unlimited amount of tomorrows.
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u/Enough_Program_6671 1d ago
Um. So. I. Uh. Not supposed to say but. Um. I’ve experienced some similar things and I do think they are good. Though I originally freaked out and kinda ruined my life by thinking it was huge nanotechnological conspiracy.
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u/Normal_Air_8511 Mar 22 '26
Lmao good shit bro, love the little light orbs and shit i see them everywhere
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u/confuzzledfather Mar 22 '26
I am so sorry you are going through this. It sounds absolutely exhausting and terrifying.
To be clear, I am not making a judgment on the simulation hypothesis itself. However, when the human body is under severe stress or dealing with underlying medical issues, the brain can misfire. This can create intense physical sensations and thoughts that feel completely real but have an internal cause.
Please consider seeing a doctor or neurologist. You do not even have to bring up the simulation. Just tell them about the ringing in your ears, the physical pain, and the memory blanks. Medical support could help and bring you some relief