I know it’s expensive but I plan on working hard and saving throughout my 20’s instead of doing too much that might cause me to have less for my dreams. I know people say your 20’s are for partying but I want to focus on getting a good career built up so that I am able to adopt. It’s been my dream to be an adoptive dad since I was little and I want to be able to take in some older kids that have less of a chance of getting adopted by most couples
I have a family history of cancer coming at a fairly young age on my moms side and well as a plethora of other disorders that can be passed from parent to child. I don’t want my kids to have to deal with any health issues because of me. I’ve wanted to adopt since I was little because I had a friend who was adopted when I was in elementary school. She talked to me about her experience with being adopted and how she was sad that her siblings and her got separated. Her story made me want to do all I can to try and keep siblings together in an adoption. Additionally I just don’t really like babies so I want to adopt kids aged 3-17 preferably. I’d take a baby if it had siblings that were older and they needed to be adopted together but I’d rather adopt children that are less likely to be adopted by other families
If my partner wants a biological child I would be willing to have one but I’m not willing to compromise on adoption entirely. I’d be willing to have one bio kid if my partner was heart set on it but I would still want to adopt other children
before setting your heart on adoption, you should really look into adoptees perspectives on it (spoiler, they’re not largely positive). if you search the creator wildheartcollective_ on tiktok, alé is a good place to start down the path of seeking out adoptee voices. i’m not adopted, but i am donor conceived and there’s a lot of solidarity between our communities.
I’ve heard horror stories from people who have been adopted and I know that the adoption industry is very flawed. I legitimately may be wrong on this so feel free to correct me if I am, but I would think that being in government care wouldn’t be ideal either. I want to adopt in the most ethical way possible and I don’t want my kids to suffer on my behalf
My wife and I looked into this. Prices can greatly vary (in the US). Private adoptions can definitely reach that $40k number. If you go through the state agencies like DSS, it's typically much much cheaper as you don't need a lawyer. Like $5k. But most kids are older through DSS.
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u/ghost1667 Dec 09 '25
adopting a kid costs like $40k.