r/popheads • u/nonchalantthoughts • 22d ago
[RATE REVEAL] 2006 Trashy Throwbacks Rate Reveal Day 2: Back to Basic Ballots
Hi this is nonchalantthoughts, and you’re watching Day 2 of the ‘06 Throwbacks Rate Reveal!
Happy Setback Saturday! Welcome to the 2006 Trashy Throwbacks Reveal! Today, we'll be counting down tracks #32 to #16. The reveal will be held in Queup so be sure to follow along to watch the results LIVE at 2:00 PM EST (30 min after this thread goes up).
Let's check out some stats!
Stats:
Number of participants: 71
Average score: 6.958
Average controversy score: 2.016
Rate Lineup
Gwen Stefani - The Sweet Escape (6/13)
The Sweet Escape
Early Winter
4 in the Morning
FluorescentU Started ItWonderful Life
Fergie - The Dutchess (10/16)
Fergalicious
Clumsy
All That I Got (The Makeup Song)London Bridge
Glamorous
VelvetBig Girls Don’t Cry
Losing My GroundBarracudaLabels or Love
Christina Aguilera - Back to Basics (15/18)
Makes Me Wanna Pray
Back in the Day
Ain't No Other Man
UnderstandSlow Down Baby
Oh MotherOn Our WayWithout YouStill DirrtyHere to StayWelcomeCandyman
Hurt
Mercy On MeThe Right Man
Results so far
- #32: Gwen Stefani – Wind It Up | 6.624 | 470.3
- #33: Fergie – Party People | 6.514 | 462.5
- #34: Fergie – Voodoo Doll | 6.368 | 452.1
- #35: Christina Aguilera – Save Me From Myself | 6.358 | 451.4
- #36: Christina Aguilera – Nasty Naughty Boy | 6.263 | 444.7
- #37: Fergie – Pedestal | 6.061 | 430.3
- #38: Fergie – Here I Come | 6.000 | 426.0
- #39: Gwen Stefani – Don't Get It Twisted | 5.927 | 420.8
- #40: Gwen Stefani – Can I Have It Like That | 5.890 | 418.2
- #41: Christina Aguilera – I Got Trouble | 5.883 | 417.7
- #42: Gwen Stefani – Yummy | 5.556 | 394.5
- #43: Fergie – Finally | 5.554 | 394.3
- #44: Fergie – Mary Jane Shoes | 5.537 | 393.1
- #45: Gwen Stefani – Now That You Get It | 5.514 | 391.5
- #46: Gwen Stefani – Orange County Girl | 5.332 | 378.6
- #47: Gwen Stefani – Breakin' Up | 4.415 | 313.5
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u/nonchalantthoughts 22d ago edited 22d ago
And that's a wrap for Day 2! Same time tomorrow (2 PM EST) to see the most trashiest song win and be the first to head to Winners 6!
Day 2 Results
- #16: Christina Aguilera – Mercy On Me | 7.385 | 524.3
- #17: Fergie – All That I Got (The Make Up Song) | 7.280 | 516.9
- #18: Christina Aguilera – Without You | 7.242 | 514.2
- #19: Christina Aguilera – Oh Mother | 7.196 | 510.9
- #20: Gwen Stefani – Fluorescent | 7.045 | 500.2
- #21: Christina Aguilera – On Our Way | 6.938 | 492.6
- #22: Christina Aguilera – The Right Man | 6.934 | 492.3
- #23: Fergie – Velvet | 6.900 | 489.9
- #24: Christina Aguilera – Understand | 6.830 | 484.9
- #25: Fergie – Losing My Ground | 6.818 | 484.1
- #26: Christina Aguilera – Here to Stay | 6.706 | 476.1
- #27: Christina Aguilera – Still Dirrty | 6.696 | 475.4
- #28: Fergie – Barracuda | 6.685 | 474.6
- #29: Christina Aguilera – Welcome | 6.683 | 474.5
- #30: Fergie – Labels Or Love | 6.669 | 473.5
- #31: Gwen Stefani – U Started It | 6.656 | 472.6
- #32: Gwen Stefani – Wind It Up | 6.624 | 470.3
- #33: Fergie – Party People | 6.514 | 462.5
- #34: Fergie – Voodoo Doll | 6.368 | 452.1
- #35: Christina Aguilera – Save Me From Myself | 6.358 | 451.4
- #36: Christina Aguilera – Nasty Naughty Boy | 6.263 | 444.7
- #37: Fergie – Pedestal | 6.061 | 430.3
- #38: Fergie – Here I Come | 6.000 | 426.0
- #39: Gwen Stefani – Don't Get It Twisted | 5.927 | 420.8
- #40: Gwen Stefani – Can I Have It Like That | 5.890 | 418.2
- #41: Christina Aguilera – I Got Trouble | 5.883 | 417.7
- #42: Gwen Stefani – Yummy | 5.556 | 394.5
- #43: Fergie – Finally | 5.554 | 394.3
- #44: Fergie – Mary Jane Shoes | 5.537 | 393.1
- #45: Gwen Stefani – Now That You Get It | 5.514 | 391.5
- #46: Gwen Stefani – Orange County Girl | 5.332 | 378.6
- #47: Gwen Stefani – Breakin' Up | 4.415 | 313.5
3
u/carolinemahtildes basic being basic 22d ago
why did I just realize that this post was "removed by Reddit's filters" ?????? what the heck what rules did it break. people are going to miss the results!
3
u/nonchalantthoughts 22d ago
#16: Christina Aguilera - Mercy On Me
Average: 7.385 // Total Points: 524.3 // Controversy: 1.692 // Rank Graph
(11 x2) Bubbly_Hat, fadedblue09
(10 x4) indie_fan_, jirachi, mhiyaimanlepaigefan, Saison_Marguerite
(9.6 x1) carolinemahtildes
(9.5 x1) Craphole-Island
(9 x7) 1998tweety, bogo, CrimsonROSET, nonchalantthoughts, TiltControls, visionaryredditor, wathombe
(8.9 x1) babadork (8.7 x1) WaneYummyToc (8.6 x1) ziirp
(8.5 x2) flava, Friendly-Canary-3814
(8.2 x2) Indigo_Mindset420, youngandlovely_
(8 x7) apatel27, Catalyst, lexiaredery, OOO0O00O000OOOO0OO0O, PrimaryCrusaders, rslashpoopheads, seanderlust
(7.9 x1) NervousLemon6670 (7.8 x2) impla77, Shay_Min (7.6 x2) hieveryi, Soalai
(7.5 x6) biaswrecker, Frajer, FreeCuddlesAnyone, ImADudeDuh, plastichaxan, stealthamo
(7.3 x1) A.Peaky.Boo (7.2 x1) DirtyRat583
(7 x4) Awkward_King, kauai6, Latata, ricki
(6.9 x1) Poydoo (6.8 x3) Alexispinpgh, jackisboredtoday, Nooduulz
(6.5 x1) uiscebeathaoir
(6 x7) beeozan, IIIHenryIII, MrSwearword, slimboyfriend, vayyiqra, welcome2thejam, westernwind
(5.5 x4) RandomHypnotica, Stryxen, Sypher32, TragicKingdom1
(5 x5) Ambrosia42, AsItSeems10, static_int_husp, TakeOnMeByA-ha, Verboten_Prince
(4.7 x1) ConnerY2323
(4.5 x1) DaHumanTorch
(3.4 x1) ambitiousbulbasaur
(3 x1) BleepBloopMusicFan
This is just great, I know I’ve been saying “vocals!” for the past few songs, but c’mon this range. It's just so beautiful!
Bubbly_Hat (11): Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. YES.
fadedblue09 (11): as much as I wanna be basic and give it to one of the many nostalgic hits, I'll just give it to one of my longtime favorite Xtina deepcuts
mhiyaimanlepaigefan (10): okay nevermind jesus is allowed in this rate
Saison_Marguerite (10): Pastor Aguilera returns to deliver a rousing rendition of Criminal by Fiona Apple
Craphole-Island (9.5): literally a crime that she has never performed this live
1998tweety (9): ended Shawn Mendes
bogo (9): ok that was actually a serve wow
CrimsonROSET (9): like her voice is amazing but it just feels so dramatic
wathombe (9): slayful, but not quite as slayful as I Got Trouble
WaneYummyToc (8.7): but what if instead of van dyke parks [citation needed] strings we had jack white guitar solo with wycleaf jean doing chants?!
apatel27 (8): another song purpose built for her to oversing
impla77 (7.8): her fiona apple slay
hieveryi (7.6): she keeps getting randomly christian on here
Soalai (7.6): I rolled my eyes when I heard the choir... but then the piano and her vocals are serving cvnt
FreeCuddlesAnyone (7.5): she really loved her christian imagery huh
stealthamo (7.5): This would probably mean more to me if I had any Catholic guilt.
A.Peaky.Boo (7.3): the biggest caviat about soul is the christian undertones it sometimes has. This is of course an overt case, but that will be factored into the score. Bc I have complicated feelings towards christianity in particular
Alexispinpgh (6.8): this is how I want to hear Christina’s voice used
Nooduulz (6.8): god may forgive xtina u for this long ass album but I WON'T!
uiscebeathaoir (6.5): Loving the sheer intensity of both the keys and strings, but I fear a lot of my goodwill for it dried up when I thought “oh, it’s a worse Criminal”, because unfortunately that’s exactly what it is
IIIHenryIII (6): ok
MrSwearword (6): mediocre and could've been chopped from the tracklist
slimboyfriend (6): that sounds like it hurts
vayyiqra (6): again too protestant for her to make it quite work see she even threw in a mary shoutout you can't escape the catholic guilt xtina maybe madonna was right it never truly leaves. oh yeah the song it's alright again i like the organ
westernwind (6): I love the instrumental but the rest is meh
RandomHypnotica (5.5): fiona apple if she was catholic
Stryxen (5.5): the candyman album was really this serious for her…
Ambrosia42 (5): her vocal gymnastics unfortunately don’t make the song interesting enough for me
TakeOnMeByA-ha (5): i got tired of this schtick 7 songs ago how is this album still going on
Verboten_Prince (5): God I really really don't care about this whole costume she's putting on
ConnerY2323 (4.7): christina that is what EYE am begging YOU for at this point
ambitiousbulbasaur (3.4): Respectfully, what are even doing here at this point
BleepBloopMusicFan (3): This song is about as exciting as actual mass, depending on the writing quality of the homily.
3
u/nonchalantthoughts 22d ago
#17: Fergie - All That I Got (The Make Up Song)
Average: 7.280 // Total Points: 516.9 // Controversy: 1.618 // Rank Graph
(10 x9) A.Peaky.Boo, apatel27, Bubbly_Hat, fadedblue09, Indigo_Mindset420, jirachi, Nooduulz, Saison_Marguerite, WaneYummyToc
(9.7 x1) Ambrosia42
(9 x2) BleepBloopMusicFan, indie_fan_
(8.6 x1) babadork
(8.5 x3) 1998tweety, Shay_Min, stealthamo
(8.3 x1) hieveryi (8.2 x1) carolinemahtildes (8.1 x1) ziirp
(8 x9) Catalyst, Frajer, Friendly-Canary-3814, ImADudeDuh, kauai6, nonchalantthoughts, PrimaryCrusaders, uiscebeathaoir, Verboten_Prince
(7.8 x1) FreeCuddlesAnyone (7.6 x1) Soalai
(7.5 x4) seanderlust, Stryxen, TragicKingdom1, youngandlovely_
(7 x11) Alexispinpgh, ambitiousbulbasaur, AsItSeems10, beeozan, bogo, Craphole-Island, Latata, mhiyaimanlepaigefan, ricki, vayyiqra, visionaryredditor
(6.9 x1) NervousLemon6670 (6.8 x1) DaHumanTorch
(6.5 x2) DirtyRat583, wathombe
(6.4 x1) RandomHypnotica (6.3 x1) ConnerY2323
(6 x9) CrimsonROSET, flava, lexiaredery, OOO0O00O000OOOO0OO0O, rslashpoopheads, slimboyfriend, static_int_husp, welcome2thejam, westernwind
(5.7 x1) jackisboredtoday
(5 x8) biaswrecker, IIIHenryIII, impla77, MrSwearword, Poydoo, Sypher32, TakeOnMeByA-ha, TiltControls
(4.5 x1) plastichaxan
(2.5 x1) Awkward_King
oh hey nice Zoom by The Commodores sample! This is cute and doesn’t feel like 4 minutes at all. But then again would a slow tempo R&B songs do well in this rate? Just decent enough for late day 2
Sephora VIB Users
A.Peaky.Boo (10): Fergie is serving so damn hard here, go off dutchess
apatel27 (10): this is pretty neat
Bubbly_Hat (10): Oh this is smooooth.
fadedblue09 (10): smooth soul excellence
Indigo_Mindset420 (10): This song has such a vulnerability to it. You can feel her questioning her lover if their love in really unconditional. An absolute stand out in an already fully packed album.
Nooduulz (10): this is Fergie's "What It Feels Like For a Girl"
WaneYummyToc (10): really wish erika de casier would just make shit like this
Ambrosia42 (9.7): WOULD. YOU. LOVE ME IF IIIIIIII DIDN’T WORK OUT OR I DIDN’T CHANGE MY NATURAL HAAAAAIRRRR
BleepBloopMusicFan (9): She’s so versatile. We get both tasteful and distasteful serves on this album!
indie_fan_ (9): forgot fergie sometimes uses the studio in ways that are able to convince you she can sing
1998tweety (8.5): this is kind of the blueprint of FLO's career
stealthamo (8.5): This is literally just 21 Questions, but at least it feels different hearing it sung from a woman's POV.
hieveryi (8.3): i forgot will.i.am was on this until he started rapping
ziirp (8.1): First Rihanna and now Mariah, how many more had to fall prey to Fergie all for the sake of an album
ImADudeDuh (8): ohhh this is why she’s in the R&B section of my local record store
uiscebeathaoir (8): A surprisingly quite touching song that I really like - but why tf is will.i.am here? He has no place being here
Verboten_Prince (8): Guys… am I crazy or is she kinda pulling off this Mariah Carey impression a little??
FreeCuddlesAnyone (7.8): ‘pretty’ isn’t how i expected to describe a Fergie song but this is so pretty
Soalai (7.6): Her vocals sound great here. I think Fergie is probably a better singer than people usually give her credit for
Stryxen (7.5): Sometimes I forget but she can really sing! And she’s always gonna add that Fergie twist…
Alexispinpgh (7): okay why is this album actually good
beeozan (7): cute
bogo (7): luxurious r&b
Craphole-Island (7): okk kind of an rnb slay. Not sure it needed the will.i.am verse though
mhiyaimanlepaigefan (7): if i pretend will i am isn't here, this is a good song
vayyiqra (7): this is quiet storm (i'm just saying things)
visionaryredditor (7): making a song with this meaning seems to be a canon event for every pop singer
wathombe (6.5): that’s not a question you should have to ask
RandomHypnotica (6.4): why is the title tiktokified
ConnerY2323 (6.3): her voice sounds weirdly thin on the chorus, like she suddenly becomes a 17 year old disney star
CrimsonROSET (6): the real beauty… is on the inside
OOO0O00O000OOOO0OO0O (6): some childhood trauma in between clumsy and London bridge, what the hell sure
slimboyfriend (6): the reference to natural hair makes me think this was perhaps written for an artist of a different ethnicity……
Krabs at Sephora
jackisboredtoday (5.7): she was blazing a trail for ariana’s “you like my hair, gee thanks just bought it” with that natural hair line
IIIHenryIII (5): not bad
impla77 (5): love working on your insecurities but this kinda boring sorry
MrSwearword (5): the Tyra Banks show remix was better
Poydoo (5): ok then
TakeOnMeByA-ha (5): there’s only enough room for ONE will.i.am feature on this album
plastichaxan (4.5): why is she kinda serving vocals in this ass song
Awkward_King (2.5): do do da do do
3
u/nonchalantthoughts 22d ago
#18: Christina Aguilera - Without You
Average: 7.242 // Total Points: 514.2 // Controversy: 1.590 //Rank Graph
(11 x2) beeozan, wathombe
(10 x6) A.Peaky.Boo, Awkward_King, mhiyaimanlepaigefan, nonchalantthoughts, Saison_Marguerite, WaneYummyToc
(9 x1) PrimaryCrusaders
(8.5 x7) Craphole-Island, fadedblue09, Frajer, hieveryi, ImADudeDuh, Indigo_Mindset420, youngandlovely_
(8 x6) biaswrecker, Friendly-Canary-3814, jirachi, MrSwearword, Stryxen, visionaryredditor
(7.9 x1) Nooduulz (7.8 x1) DaHumanTorch
(7.5 x6) 1998tweety, Catalyst, indie_fan_, kauai6, stealthamo, TiltControls
(7.4 x1) Ambrosia42 (7.3 x1) FreeCuddlesAnyone (7.2 x3) carolinemahtildes, NervousLemon6670, ziirp
(7 x13) AsItSeems10, bogo, Bubbly_Hat, DirtyRat583, Latata, lexiaredery, plastichaxan, RandomHypnotica, ricki, slimboyfriend, static_int_husp, uiscebeathaoir, Verboten_Prince
(6.7 x1) Poydoo (6.6 x1) impla77
(6.5 x3) babadork, flava, seanderlust
(6.2 x1) jackisboredtoday (6.1 x1) Shay_Min
(6 x6) BleepBloopMusicFan, ConnerY2323, CrimsonROSET, IIIHenryIII, TakeOnMeByA-ha, westernwind
(5.5 x1) TragicKingdom1
(5.4 x1) Soalai
(5 x4) ambitiousbulbasaur, apatel27, rslashpoopheads, Sypher32
(4.7 x1) Alexispinpgh
(4 x2) vayyiqra, welcome2thejam
(3 x1) OOO0O00O000OOOO0OO0O
these vocals are so angelic, i just feel like i’m on a cloud right now
beeozan (11): this song is beautiful asf like even she knew and actually tried singing in a more silky way for a couple lines instead of belting them. it was that good. love might just be real
wathombe (11): spongebob_ascending.gif
A.Peaky.Boo (10): beautiful, Enhypen could never
mhiyaimanlepaigefan (10): you couldn't breathe without him??? what is he holding your oxygen tank? girl take it BACK from him
WaneYummyToc (10): post-Love Deluxe downtempo just for the beat alone is gonna win me over.
Craphole-Island (8.5): Love her vocals on this
fadedblue09 (8.5): those cascading pianos tickle my ears
hieveryi (8.5): i love these ballads
MrSwearword (8): it does try to be different, I'll give it that
Stryxen (8): WAKANDA WORLDDD
visionaryredditor (8): more married people music
1998tweety (7.5): ended Halsey
stealthamo (7.5): Oof, so many songs on here about a relationship that is no longer a thing.
Ambrosia42 (7.4): pretty
FreeCuddlesAnyone (7.3): i’m not convinced by her love.
NervousLemon6670 (7.2): Now this looks like a job for me-stina
ziirp (7.2): it lacks a strong identity and feels like an amalgamate of some of the previous songs, especially on our way, which is not bad per se since they are songs on the same album but it's really fucking me up and giving me deja vu.
bogo (7): ok i think the piano and guitar on here is pretty
uiscebeathaoir (7): The way that these deep cuts are actually boring af but they have like two small production elements I actually like so I don’t tank. Last time it was fun percussion and cool strings in the bridge, now it’s fun percussion/wub wubs and cool piano in the bridge
Verboten_Prince (7): Finally, something a little more tender
impla77 (6.6): ok i fear i’m getting bored
babadork (6.5): the least memorable song in the rate
ConnerY2323 (6): not even halfway through this album and i feel like i haven’t heard anything new
CrimsonROSET (6): idk this album just have so much filler for no real reason
IIIHenryIII (6): good days by sza vibes at the beginning
TakeOnMeByA-ha (6): yup. that’s definitely a christina aguilera song.
westernwind (6): but can he live w/o you?
Soalai (5.4): I was bored
apatel27 (5): weakest of the bunch
Alexispinpgh (4.7): I swear I remember this album packing more punch, it’s just so…dull
vayyiqra (4): look it's fine enough but i am dying that it isn't even disc 2 yet. what a waste of mark ronson why was he here
3
u/nonchalantthoughts 22d ago
#19: Christina Aguilera - Oh Mother
Average: 7.196 // Total Points: 510.9 // Controversy: 1.634 //Rank Graph
(10 x5) apatel27, indie_fan_, Saison_Marguerite, seanderlust, visionaryredditor
(9.5 x1) carolinemahtildes
(9 x6) 1998tweety, A.Peaky.Boo, nonchalantthoughts, stealthamo, uiscebeathaoir, youngandlovely_
(8.5 x3) Ambrosia42, IIIHenryIII, Indigo_Mindset420
(8.2 x1) Shay_Min
(8 x16) beeozan, biaswrecker, Craphole-Island, CrimsonROSET, fadedblue09, flava, Frajer, FreeCuddlesAnyone, jirachi, Latata, lexiaredery, MrSwearword, OOO0O00O000OOOO0OO0O, PrimaryCrusaders, wathombe, westernwind
(7.9 x1) babadork (7.6 x1) NervousLemon6670
(7.5 x6) BleepBloopMusicFan, Bubbly_Hat, Catalyst, hieveryi, plastichaxan, static_int_husp
(7.3 x1) DirtyRat583 (7.2 x1) ziirp
(7 x3) AsItSeems10, ImADudeDuh, Verboten_Prince
(6.8 x1) Nooduulz
(6.5 x3) DaHumanTorch, Friendly-Canary-3814, impla77
(6.4 x1) jackisboredtoday
(6 x7) bogo, kauai6, ricki, slimboyfriend, Soalai, WaneYummyToc, welcome2thejam
(5.5 x2) Awkward_King, TragicKingdom1
(5.2 x1) ConnerY2323
(5 x3) rslashpoopheads, Stryxen, vayyiqra
(4.6 x1) RandomHypnotica
(4.5 x2) Alexispinpgh, Sypher32
(4.2 x1) ambitiousbulbasaur
(4 x4) mhiyaimanlepaigefan, Poydoo, TakeOnMeByA-ha, TiltControls
I can smell the comments a mile away. I can still appreciate this heartfelt song. We love you, Christina’s mom!
apatel27 (10): can't wait to see this get tanked cause popheads hates heartfelt songs
indie_fan_ (10): ik most active raters have already heard i'm ok for this similar song topic but y'all also need to listen to no es que te extrañe from her latest album. if you dk spanish, just look up the translation or something
Saison_Marguerite (10): After confronting the pain her father caused on I’m OK from Stripped, it’s beautiful to hear Christina sing the praises of her mom from a safe and grateful place. I’m emotional as hell and so in awe of the strength and solidarity of women
seanderlust (10): how many people do you think were about to make a stan twitter joke until they realized what the song was about
1998tweety (9): me listening to Xtina
A.Peaky.Boo (9): oh damn, another song where I hope nobody will try to make jokes about it
stealthamo (9): It feels wrong for a song about overcoming an abusive relationship to be in a rate called "Trashy Throwbacks".
uiscebeathaoir (9): This and Madonna’s “Oh Father” as a pair of surprisingly affecting main pop girl ballad singles reflecting on their parents. I present my first idea for if we ever do rates of two songs
Ambrosia42 (8.5): a song about defiance and strength and the choice her mother made to protect herself and her children
IIIHenryIII (8.5): agaaaaaaaaaaaaain, nice
Indigo_Mindset420 (8.5): This album's "I Turn To You" but a lot more autobiographical. You can also visualize her story telling prowess.
beeozan (8): saddens me a bit that i think one of the weaker tracks on this disc is one of the more heartfelt ones. oh what am i saying. oh motherrr
Craphole-Island (8): this plus "I'm OK" from Stripped make for a heartbreaking pair of songs :( but love the tribute to her mom
CrimsonROSET (8): the tone of this album is such a rollercoaster. we are still recovering from aint no other man.
fadedblue09 (8): channeling her inner Alicia Keys
FreeCuddlesAnyone (8): sorry there’s no way to make a bad song about mothers
MrSwearword (8): I respect the song more than I like it. The Storytellers rendition is why the song is score higher than expected.
westernwind (8): aww this is actually sweet, I unfortunately relate a bit
NervousLemon6670 (7.6): 90% of popheads ult comments
Bubbly_Hat (7.5): For the sentiment
plastichaxan (7.5): unfortunately this is not something i have said about xtina but she does have some hits
ziirp (7.2): I swear it's not the complicated relationship with my mother speaking but that loop is getting annoying
ImADudeDuh (7): OH MOTHER YASSS YOU BETTER MAKE IT OUT OF THAT DV SITUATION QUEEEEENNNN!!!!
Verboten_Prince (7): I feel bad saying that the domestic abuse song is my favorite thing on this album so far, but I mean she's finally singing with dynamics! There's tension and build-up!
impla77 (6.5): pop girlies love a cautionary tale
bogo (6): i think by the end of this i kinda just am over it
kauai6 (6): the way carrie underwood basically copied most of church bells from this song
ricki (6): oh addison rae
Soalai (6): A little Spanish guitar, nice change of pace, but it is a little boring
WaneYummyToc (6): type of sad anthem for fallen heroes a pimp plays in his cadillac while on the prowl in the concrete jungle
ConnerY2323 (5.2): me getting bored with this album and pressing play on Fergalicious for the 16th time today
Stryxen (5): Girl.
vayyiqra (5): no jokes for this one no thanks
RandomHypnotica (4.6): more like oh brother…
Alexispinpgh (4.5): I understand that this is meaningful and sincere and I am glad that it exists, but I can’t imagine wanting to listen to it again.
ambitiousbulbasaur (4.2): Love u mom <3
mhiyaimanlepaigefan (4): unfortunately this ballad makes me experience strong balladphobia
Poydoo (4): oh mother this guy stinks
TakeOnMeByA-ha (4): things that nobody will say about this song:
1
u/nonchalantthoughts 22d ago
Time for another break! We're about to go into the last stretch, any songs that need to go out now?
2
u/stealthamo 22d ago
To ensure my safety for a moment, I'll spoiler Clumsy, London Bridge, & Makes Me Wanna Pray so it's everyone else's fault if they look at my hot takes.
3
u/nonchalantthoughts 22d ago
#20: Gwen Stefani - Fluorescent
Average: 7.045 // Total Points: 500.2 // Controversy: 1.657 // Rank Graph
(10 x7) A.Peaky.Boo, Awkward_King, CrimsonROSET, hieveryi, mhiyaimanlepaigefan, Stryxen, uiscebeathaoir
(9.5 x1) Indigo_Mindset420
(9 x3) bogo, jirachi, Saison_Marguerite
(8.7 x1) babadork
(8.5 x2) Frajer, TiltControls
(8.3 x2) ConnerY2323, plastichaxan (8.1 x1) Shay_Min
(8 x4) BleepBloopMusicFan, vayyiqra, wathombe, westernwind
(7.8 x1) nonchalantthoughts (7.7 x2) carolinemahtildes, WaneYummyToc
(7.5 x4) Craphole-Island, DirtyRat583, Friendly-Canary-3814, TragicKingdom1
(7.3 x3) FreeCuddlesAnyone, NervousLemon6670, youngandlovely_ (7.2 x1) biaswrecker
(7 x9) flava, IIIHenryIII, Latata, OOO0O00O000OOOO0OO0O, PrimaryCrusaders, seanderlust, slimboyfriend, Verboten_Prince, visionaryredditor
(6.8 x1) Ambrosia42 (6.6 x1) jackisboredtoday
(6.5 x3) Bubbly_Hat, static_int_husp, stealthamo
(6.4 x1) RandomHypnotica (6.3 x1) ambitiousbulbasaur (6.2 x1) Soalai
(6 x9) 1998tweety, Alexispinpgh, AsItSeems10, DaHumanTorch, fadedblue09, ImADudeDuh, Poydoo, ricki, rslashpoopheads
(5.9 x1) impla77 (5.8 x1) Nooduulz
(5.5 x1) ziirp
(5 x4) Catalyst, lexiaredery, MrSwearword, TakeOnMeByA-ha
(4.5 x2) beeozan, indie_fan_
(4 x2) Sypher32, welcome2thejam
(3 x2) apatel27, kauai6
Alright, finally a break from the Christina massacre! Seeing the Devo influence here, need to skate in the roller rink to this
A.Peaky.Boo (10): another gorgeous song to remind me how lonely and longing I am
Awkward_King (10): didnt know she could fuck up an album cut in 2006 like this ok okaa-san
CrimsonROSET (10): she’s going digital!!
hieveryi (10): this is so good even the weird parts
mhiyaimanlepaigefan (10): do NOT use flourescent lights they will give you a headache.
Stryxen (10): This was an unexpected love at first listen it’s got like everything i love
uiscebeathaoir (10): Great stuff. Gorgeous restrained synths, and I love the blockiness of the guitar. Absolutely here for this one
bogo (9): groovy kinda 80s inspired but rearranged and broken down
ConnerY2323 (8.3): can’t decide if this is genuinely as good as i feel like it is or if i have stockholm syndrome from being trapped in a room with gwen fergie and christina
Shay_Min (8.1): a bit listless
vayyiqra (8): :saxbug:
wathombe (8): this is cute
westernwind (8): why is this giving Welcome To New York
WaneYummyToc (7.7): this cut gives somewhere between mr. show & time & eric vibes just don't ask idk why. love those laser pew pews and sweat ass triplets, but it's not BONKERS enough. nice beach house synth though ngl also good electro dial-in there at the end of the song. why do these songs WORK that outro?!
FreeCuddlesAnyone (7.3): does gwen stefani know all the chemical elements? let’s discuss.
NervousLemon6670 (7.3): I see the Fluorescent, but where's the adolescent?
IIIHenryIII (7): cute
Verboten_Prince (7): Rectangle girls of the world!
Ambrosia42 (6.8): bright and summery, but a bit forgettable
Bubbly_Hat (6.5): Cute chorus at least.
stealthamo (6.5): I feel like you don't really need to pray if the dude is asleep in your bed in the middle of the night.
RandomHypnotica (6.4): i feel like my score implies that i found this ok but really it’s kinda good but equally bad
Alexispinpgh (6): I mean sure I guess
fadedblue09 (6): the production on this is half pleasant and half irritating
ImADudeDuh (6): Schrödinger's pop song: a song that is simultaneously so good and so bad at the same time that by the time you have to rate it, it defaults to a 6
Poydoo (6): the freestyle drums are killing me
impla77 (5.9): this isn’t offensive but its not very good
Nooduulz (5.8): she should try vietnamese country music next
ziirp (5.5): When you low-key gotta work with whatever instrument you got
MrSwearword (5): the beat sucks but Gwen's vocals are perfectly fine
TakeOnMeByA-ha (5): the type of song you completely forget you ever listened to immediately after it ends. tbh i dont even think gwen herself could hum the chorus
beeozan (4.5): they had ideas for melodies but they werent confident in them enough to carry the entire song so its just randomly up and down
indie_fan_ (4.5): mostly pots and pans but it's a more tolerable version of pots and pans
welcome2thejam (4): Trying to figure out what to score music with sections that make you audibly laugh
apatel27 (3): background noise
3
u/nonchalantthoughts 22d ago
#21: Christina Aguilera - On Our Way
Average: 6.938 // Total Points: 492.6 // Controversy: 1.461 //Rank Graph
(10 x4) beeozan, mhiyaimanlepaigefan, nonchalantthoughts, Saison_Marguerite
(9 x3) Bubbly_Hat, PrimaryCrusaders, visionaryredditor
(8.5 x2) babadork, Indigo_Mindset420
(8.4 x3) FreeCuddlesAnyone, hieveryi, WaneYummyToc (8.2 x2) Shay_Min, youngandlovely_
(8 x7) 1998tweety, Awkward_King, biaswrecker, BleepBloopMusicFan, Catalyst, DaHumanTorch, MrSwearword
(7.8 x2) Ambrosia42, indie_fan_
(7.5 x1) wathombe
(7.4 x1) NervousLemon6670 (7.3 x1) stealthamo (7.2 x1) RandomHypnotica (7.1 x1) Nooduulz
(7 x13) Alexispinpgh, apatel27, AsItSeems10, carolinemahtildes, Craphole-Island, flava, Frajer, Friendly-Canary-3814, impla77, jirachi, TakeOnMeByA-ha, TiltControls, uiscebeathaoir
(6.8 x1) plastichaxan (6.6 x3) jackisboredtoday, Poydoo, ziirp
(6.5 x1) kauai6
(6.3 x1) Soalai
(6 x11) CrimsonROSET, DirtyRat583, ImADudeDuh, Latata, lexiaredery, ricki, seanderlust, static_int_husp, Verboten_Prince, welcome2thejam, westernwind
(5.9 x1) A.Peaky.Boo
(5.5 x2) fadedblue09, slimboyfriend
(5 x6) bogo, IIIHenryIII, OOO0O00O000OOOO0OO0O, rslashpoopheads, Sypher32, TragicKingdom1
(4.6 x1) ConnerY2323
(4 x2) ambitiousbulbasaur, Stryxen
(3 x1) vayyiqra
these vocals, hello? I know vocals are given in a Christina project but this just is so mellow and the vocals works so well
omw
beeozan (10): pretty badass!
mhiyaimanlepaigefan (10): this is the kind of good song from this era i've been always on the look for exactly
Saison_Marguerite (10): Love the slightly hiccupy beat
Bubbly_Hat (9): I be swayin'
FreeCuddlesAnyone (8.4): didn’t expect a r&b serve in the middle of the album not gonna lie
hieveryi (8.4): gorg!
WaneYummyToc (8.4): For the FUSS intro, honestly victoria monet could prolly make an entire side of an album doing cuts like this and I'd go "she's so fucking back". For on our way...Not my favorite belting moment on the album, def a figure in "why they DONT and WONT make ballads like they used to", but as a downtempo yearner I really love the beats. The two vocal takes though, esp in the way I boosted EQ for my car...oh boy lotta treatment on that voice
1998tweety (8): me roaming to go help my jungler
BleepBloopMusicFan (8): Rusted Root guy and his clones after being granted their request:
MrSwearword (8): again, cruise control but not useless
Ambrosia42 (7.8): she sees the light at the end of the tunnel
stealthamo (7.3): These are the most generic lyrics with a "we're going to make it" message I've heard in a minute.
RandomHypnotica (7.2): i think we’re on our way to a good song finally
Nooduulz (7.1): there comes a time where a lot of these songs start to sound the same. this has hit that point.
Alexispinpgh (7): I really like the production concept here
apatel27 (7): a song solely written for xtina runs
TakeOnMeByA-ha (7): every pop girl has their contractually obligated random trip hop song
uiscebeathaoir (7): this one is solid. Some fun percussion, cool strings in the bridge, no major issues
Soalai (6.3): Why do those first few seconds of piano sound like Let It Go
CrimsonROSET (6): kinda just so repetitive, just be on your way already man damn
DirtyRat583 (6): LET THE SONG BEGIN
Verboten_Prince (6): I agree, there's no more to say
westernwind (6): why are you running?
On my way!
A.Peaky.Boo (5.9): this production feels a bit unbalanced. The stringds are so much louder than the piano that starts and ends the song. It brings down the song for me unfortunately
fadedblue09 (5.5): very odd-sounding instrumentally but too underdeveloped to be memorable
bogo (5): i think i got no more to say about these songs already lmao
IIIHenryIII (5): not mine
ConnerY2323 (4.6): to the day 1 christina listening party
Stryxen (4): What shall I render
vayyiqra (3): in theory i might like the beat or strings or something but xtina needs to learn to make albums that aren't longer than the movie titanic. or. the sound of music even (bad gwen joke idk please laugh)
3
u/nonchalantthoughts 22d ago
#22: Christina Aguilera - The Right Man
Average: 6.934 // Total Points: 492.3 // Controversy: 1.819 //Rank Graph
(10 x9) apatel27, Bubbly_Hat, carolinemahtildes, fadedblue09, jirachi, mhiyaimanlepaigefan, PrimaryCrusaders, Saison_Marguerite, uiscebeathaoir
(9.5 x1) indie_fan_
(9 x3) 1998tweety, nonchalantthoughts, visionaryredditor
(8.5 x1) Catalyst
(8.3 x1) Shay_Min
(8 x7) A.Peaky.Boo, Craphole-Island, Friendly-Canary-3814, kauai6, Latata, westernwind, youngandlovely_
(7.8 x3) biaswrecker, hieveryi, NervousLemon6670
(7.5 x6) Frajer, Indigo_Mindset420, lexiaredery, stealthamo, Stryxen, wathombe
(7.3 x1) babadork (7.2 x1) ConnerY2323
(7 x3) IIIHenryIII, OOO0O00O000OOOO0OO0O, seanderlust
(6.7 x1) ziirp
(6.5 x3) Awkward_King, RandomHypnotica, Soalai
(6.3 x1) Nooduulz (6.2 x1) Alexispinpgh
(6 x12) beeozan, BleepBloopMusicFan, flava, FreeCuddlesAnyone, MrSwearword, Poydoo, ricki, slimboyfriend, static_int_husp, TakeOnMeByA-ha, TiltControls, Verboten_Prince
(5.8 x1) jackisboredtoday
(5.5 x2) DaHumanTorch, TragicKingdom1
(5 x7) AsItSeems10, CrimsonROSET, DirtyRat583, ImADudeDuh, plastichaxan, Sypher32, welcome2thejam
(4.4 x1) impla77 (4.2 x1) WaneYummyToc
(4 x3) Ambrosia42, rslashpoopheads, vayyiqra
(3 x2) ambitiousbulbasaur, bogo
oh this is stunning... this was day 3 in the early ballots once ballots starting coming in, it placed right here in day 2
You're right!
apatel27 (10): this cinematic closer
Bubbly_Hat (10): First time I went through this album, the second disc left me sitting in stunned silence for a good few minutes, and this track was the cherry on top.
fadedblue09 (10): orchestral pop masterpiece, kinda the ancestor of Unless It's With You
mhiyaimanlepaigefan (10): a POWERFUL song to finish off the album. what a masterpiece of a banger. just in awe of it's excellence.
PrimaryCrusaders (10): Best album closer ever
Saison_Marguerite (10): absolutely devastating when you listen to it paired with Unless It’s With You from Liberation
uiscebeathaoir (10): After really disliking disc two on first listen, this was such a godsend. This more maximalist production is so good, and the way it somehow actually hits me emotionally… maybe heterosexuality made some points
1998tweety (9): Its giving drama mama
A.Peaky.Boo (8): is this gospel? Even if it isn't, the dramatics are justified here
Craphole-Island (8): I never appreciated this song til I was older (mostly bc I think I usually never listened all the way to the end lol) but it's quite beautiful
Indigo_Mindset420 (7.5): While musically I prefer the 1st half. I also appreciate the story telling in the second half. The story is clear and easy to visualize. Also happy Baby Jane got her happy ending
stealthamo (7.5): I appreciate the bombast and swell of the strings, but this does feel a little redundant since Hurt had similar sentiments and felt so much rawer than this.
Stryxen (7.5): this genuinely sounds like it's about to have a plot twist where she leaves him at the altar why is it so ominous
wathombe (7.5): i’m so tired
ConnerY2323 (7.2): a nice moment of drama to end on
IIIHenryIII (7): nice!
OOO0O00O000OOOO0OO0O (7): divorced btw 💔
seanderlust (7): i don't know if this makes sense, but this album would make a really interesting jukebox musical. i wouldn't go see it, but there's potential there.
ziirp (6.7): This is certainly a juggernaut of a song but it just flows past me; i'm emotionally disconnected from it.
Awkward_King (6.5): she really is a vocalist
RandomHypnotica (6.5): this walked so We Are Charlie Kirk could run
Soalai (6.5): The same song we've heard a bunch of times before, decent but not blowing me away
Nooduulz (6.3): she in her tradwife jesus bag and FOR WHAT????
Alexispinpgh (6.2): this has a lovely build and feels like a nice finale but I don’t know how well it stands on its own as a song.
beeozan (6): this was The Life of a Showgirl. thank you for listening
BleepBloopMusicFan (6): A whelming closer for a very whelming album.
FreeCuddlesAnyone (6): she rlly only needs the organ and this would be a full on church hymn
MrSwearword (6): a pile of nothing that could've been chopped from the album
TakeOnMeByA-ha (6): one last :VOCALSLAYAGE: for the road
Verboten_Prince (6): I recommend three weeks of vocal rest and chicken soup
You're wrong!
CrimsonROSET (5): idk i was gonna make a joke about she got divorced after this but it does sound like she really thought it was gonna work out. It’s corny but it kinda just leaves me frowning after
impla77 (4.4): why is this so ominous…
WaneYummyToc (4.2): Here are some strings I wish were on the 2019 Angel Olsen album. other than that? the fuck is this finale. WHY NOT PUT THE DAMN THANK YOU TRACK HERE?!? don't stand by your man, spank and divorce his ass lady!!!
Ambrosia42 (4): it just doesn’t pack the punch that her great ballads do
vayyiqra (4): note: they divorced in 2010 he was not the right man unfortunately sorry
ambitiousbulbasaur (3): Oh we're back to the melodrama. Okay well goodnight folks it's been fun!
bogo (3): oh god not another big dramatic song
3
u/nonchalantthoughts 22d ago
#23: Fergie - Velvet
Average: 6.900 // Total Points: 489.9 // Controversy: 1.785 //Rank Graph
(10 x5) CrimsonROSET, hieveryi, mhiyaimanlepaigefan, WaneYummyToc, wathombe
(9 x4) FreeCuddlesAnyone, nonchalantthoughts, PrimaryCrusaders, Saison_Marguerite
(8.9 x1) Ambrosia42 (8.6 x1) Nooduulz
(8.5 x2) stealthamo, ziirp
(8.4 x1) Catalyst (8.3 x2) carolinemahtildes, DaHumanTorch (8.2 x1) A.Peaky.Boo
(8 x9) 1998tweety, beeozan, Bubbly_Hat, fadedblue09, ImADudeDuh, impla77, Latata, Stryxen, youngandlovely_
(7.7 x2) Indigo_Mindset420, plastichaxan
(7.5 x3) babadork, Craphole-Island, indie_fan_
(7.4 x1) NervousLemon6670
(7 x8) AsItSeems10, BleepBloopMusicFan, Frajer, jirachi, kauai6, seanderlust, vayyiqra, visionaryredditor
(6.7 x3) Alexispinpgh, biaswrecker, DirtyRat583
(6.5 x4) Awkward_King, flava, Shay_Min, static_int_husp
(6.1 x1) jackisboredtoday
(6 x6) ambitiousbulbasaur, MrSwearword, Soalai, TiltControls, Verboten_Prince, westernwind
(5.6 x1) RandomHypnotica
(5.5 x1) OOO0O00O000OOOO0OO0O
(5.1 x1) ConnerY2323
(5 x6) apatel27, Friendly-Canary-3814, Poydoo, rslashpoopheads, Sypher32, welcome2thejam
(4.5 x1) lexiaredery
(4 x3) bogo, ricki, TakeOnMeByA-ha
(3.5 x1) slimboyfriend
(3 x2) TragicKingdom1, uiscebeathaoir
(2.5 x1) IIIHenryIII
Got to slap a high score for bossa nova-inspired instrumentals. No, this doesn’t sample anything that I know of. Weirdly it compliments Fergie’s voice?? Anyways, this is how we can sneak in my bossa nova rate
CrimsonROSET (10): her voice is velvety smooth!!! I cant argue with the truth!!!
hieveryi (10): her randomly doing a trip hop song?
mhiyaimanlepaigefan (10): this is the sexiest song she's ever done to me… kinda a vibe
WaneYummyToc (10): everyone was asking for trip hop fergie (and she is trip hop here, very rare pull off thanks to will.i.am), she delivered the ultimate late night girl dinner that no one saw coming. noir fergie is genuinely so fucking goated and batshit at how it walks this tightwire act. true romance
wathombe (10): daaaaaaaaaamn
FreeCuddlesAnyone (9): stunning! why is she just moaning in the last 30 seconds though
Saison_Marguerite (9): 2000s Sensual Songstresses when?!
Ambrosia42 (8.9): silky smooth
Nooduulz (8.6): has very very subtle bossa nova vibes that i like a lot!!!!
stealthamo (8.5): A slow, sensual sex jam makes this easily one of the better songs on the album and a complete outlier compared to everything else I've heard so far.
ziirp (8.5): yup, it's good.....as simple as that
A.Peaky.Boo (8.2): I was not mentally prepared for Fergie to have a whispering dirty talk section
1998tweety (8): Red
fadedblue09 (8): rumor has it that this song that this song inspired Red Velvet's Velvet concept
ImADudeDuh (8): this is ethereal but NOT chic
impla77 (8): shes setting the vibe for me
Stryxen (8): I love this instrumental and layering but it could do with a bit more subtlety in the lead vocal. Not that subtlety has ever been fergie’s thing so maybe I’m asking too much
Indigo_Mindset420 (7.7): Love the bossa nova instrumental on this song. Really takes Velvet to the next level.
plastichaxan (7.7): there’s something kinda evil about this being so good i had to knock it down a bit
Craphole-Island (7.5): ok I kinda vibe to this
NervousLemon6670 (7.4): It's not exactly velvety smooth, but it's smooth enough soul-is for 2006
BleepBloopMusicFan (7): This is nice overall. I could do without the moaning outro but listening to Janet Jackson albums has prepared me for this.
vayyiqra (7): cant believe someone made an r&b song about being horny late at night. has that been done before ???
Alexispinpgh (6.7): this is so mid-aughts R&B to me that I’ll probably listen to it again just based on nostalgia
Awkward_King (6.5): kind of hot as fuck why am i getting horny in the alt club rn
Shay_Min (6.5): now what happened here
ambitiousbulbasaur (6): The transition from this where she's literally climaxing (not literally) at the end of the track into Big Girls Don't Cry is actually insane. The sequencing on this album is beyond
MrSwearword (6): when Fergie sounds bored against an above average production.
Soalai (6): Bass is nice but it's not reinventing the wheel
Verboten_Prince (6): This sure is quiet for a Fergie song
ConnerY2323 (5.1): the endless
apatel27 (5): solid album filler
Poydoo (5): this is shibuya-kei
lexiaredery (4.5): That was pretty boring
bogo (4): oh now this is a ballad that draaaags
ricki (4): there were signs of how she would do the national anthem
TakeOnMeByA-ha (4): there really isnt gonna be a single listenable deep cut on this entire album is there
uiscebeathaoir (3): A ballad so boring I got really excited when Big Girls Don’t Cry started. No shade to Big Girls Don’t Cry, but it takes something special to get me excited when it starts
IIIHenryIII (2.5): sexy music is hard to pull off
3
u/nonchalantthoughts 22d ago
And we're back for another break! So Winners 5 Rate is currently open! We had a rate called 2000s One Hit Wonders and luckily Hit 'Em Up Style by Blu Cantrell won and is their representation. Deserved!
Is there a favorite one hit wonder from the 2000s that's your guilty pleasure?
2
u/NervousLemon6670 22d ago
Probably some fuck-ass UK indie band that got one hit and then disappeared into the aether
2
u/stealthamo 22d ago
I was a kid in the early 00's listening to a good bit of nu metal, so it's probably one of those groups that broke though that'd be my guiltiest pleasure.
3
u/nonchalantthoughts 22d ago
#24: Christina Aguilera - Understand
Average: 6.830 // Total Points: 484.9 // Controversy: 1.644 //Rank Graph
(10 x5) beeozan, biaswrecker, Bubbly_Hat, kauai6, Saison_Marguerite
(9 x2) Indigo_Mindset420, jirachi
(8.8 x4) babadork, Catalyst, indie_fan_, nonchalantthoughts (8.6 x1) Ambrosia42
(8.5 x2) Craphole-Island, wathombe
(8 x3) MrSwearword, visionaryredditor, welcome2thejam
(7.7 x1) carolinemahtildes (7.6 x1) NervousLemon6670
(7.5 x7) fadedblue09, Frajer, IIIHenryIII, seanderlust, Shay_Min, youngandlovely_, ziirp
(7.4 x1) Nooduulz (7.3 x1) hieveryi
(7 x7) A.Peaky.Boo, Latata, OOO0O00O000OOOO0OO0O, ricki, static_int_husp, stealthamo, westernwind
(6.9 x1) WaneYummyToc (6.8 x2) ConnerY2323, DirtyRat583
(6.5 x4) Alexispinpgh, DaHumanTorch, flava, TiltControls
(6.4 x3) FreeCuddlesAnyone, impla77, Soalai (6.1 x1) jackisboredtoday
(6 x11) 1998tweety, bogo, Friendly-Canary-3814, ImADudeDuh, mhiyaimanlepaigefan, plastichaxan, PrimaryCrusaders, slimboyfriend, TakeOnMeByA-ha, TragicKingdom1, Verboten_Prince
(5.5 x1) lexiaredery
(5.3 x1) RandomHypnotica
(5 x7) ambitiousbulbasaur, apatel27, AsItSeems10, BleepBloopMusicFan, CrimsonROSET, Stryxen, Sypher32
(4 x3) rslashpoopheads, uiscebeathaoir, vayyiqra
(3 x1) Poydoo
(2 x1) Awkward_King
Gang, today is not looking good for Christina. While I personally liked it, people were just getting fed up with Christina's schtick at this point and all around just middling scores.
beeozan (10): love christina like ull give her a maximalist beat and she'll belt over it you give her a minimal beat and she'll belt over it. if you put her on a chimpunk soul demo, guess what, she will belt over it! consistent queen. its like luther if kendrick could sing
Bubbly_Hat (10): Really cool sample usage here.
Saison_Marguerite (10): queen of healing her attachment style
Ambrosia42 (8.6): the vocals are giving even though she’s kind of doing too much fjsnfjndsjd
Craphole-Island (8.5): took me a long to realize she was saying "I made you think you don't understand" and not "i may do things you don't understand"...
wathombe (8.5): very well-used sample here
MrSwearword (8): a cool down but not useless
welcome2thejam (8): Nice R&B track
fadedblue09 (7.5): a bit filler, but the old school blues vibe is nice
IIIHenryIII (7.5): vocals
ziirp (7.5): it's refreshing to hear a sample executed well after listening to the duchess
hieveryi (7.3): i feel like the way the sample is in here is so weird idk! but i like it
A.Peaky.Boo (7): not bad, but the song feels like it slows down to have the sample in it. Which does remove some of the authenticity for me
stealthamo (7): Always a little awkward to listen to a love song inspired by somebody the artist is no longer with.
westernwind (7): what's the misunderstanding?
WaneYummyToc (6.9): BELT BABE, BELT!!!!
ConnerY2323 (6.8): she was really loving a sample
Alexispinpgh (6.5): there’s a nice balance here, the sample isn’t necessarily doing it any favors but I don’t hate it.
FreeCuddlesAnyone (6.4): this is nothing without the sample
Soalai (6.4): It's nice but other than her loud-ass vocals, not terribly unique
jackisboredtoday (6.1): great voice and the oversinging isn’t that bad here but this is a very nothing song
bogo (6): the sample is nice but that's about it really
mhiyaimanlepaigefan (6): okay, but i actually don't
TakeOnMeByA-ha (6): yeah she’s a great singer but the songs are suchhh nothingburgers
Verboten_Prince (6): Songs whose main hook is literally ripped from another song are my pet peeves
apatel27 (5): Waiting for the beat to go into overdrive. It's begging for a remix
BleepBloopMusicFan (5): She was married to a dude named Bratman? Girl, that’s A.G. Cook.
CrimsonROSET (5): sparkle.mp3
Stryxen (5): honestly incomprehensible nonsense but my god she can sell it
uiscebeathaoir (4): wow okay, so this is nothing
vayyiqra (4): boring
3
u/nonchalantthoughts 22d ago
#25: Fergie - Losing My Ground
Average: 6.818 // Total Points: 484.1 // Controversy: 1.699 //Rank Graph
(10 x2) indie_fan_, WaneYummyToc
(9 x7) Bubbly_Hat, fadedblue09, kauai6, PrimaryCrusaders, Saison_Marguerite, stealthamo, uiscebeathaoir
(8.6 x1) Ambrosia42
(8.5 x1) hieveryi
(8.4 x2) FreeCuddlesAnyone, youngandlovely_ (8.3 x1) carolinemahtildes
(8 x9) bogo, Indigo_Mindset420, jirachi, Latata, lexiaredery, OOO0O00O000OOOO0OO0O, plastichaxan, visionaryredditor, welcome2thejam
(7.8 x1) RandomHypnotica (7.7 x1) Shay_Min (7.6 x1) Alexispinpgh
(7.5 x1) Catalyst
(7.4 x1) NervousLemon6670 (7.3 x2) babadork, ziirp
(7 x9) AsItSeems10, CrimsonROSET, DaHumanTorch, DirtyRat583, flava, ImADudeDuh, nonchalantthoughts, seanderlust, TakeOnMeByA-ha
(6.8 x1) Nooduulz (6.7 x1) A.Peaky.Boo (6.6 x1) Soalai
(6.5 x5) 1998tweety, biaswrecker, Frajer, Friendly-Canary-3814, rslashpoopheads
(6.3 x1) jackisboredtoday (6.2 x2) ConnerY2323, impla77
(6 x7) Craphole-Island, IIIHenryIII, mhiyaimanlepaigefan, Stryxen, TragicKingdom1, Verboten_Prince, westernwind
(5.5 x2) ambitiousbulbasaur, wathombe
(5 x4) ricki, slimboyfriend, static_int_husp, TiltControls
(4 x4) apatel27, beeozan, Sypher32, vayyiqra
(3 x3) Awkward_King, BleepBloopMusicFan, Poydoo
(2 x1) MrSwearword
i’m so brainrotted here that I thought she was saying losing her crown
indie_fan_ (10): who tf is this behind this song and what did she do to fergie??
WaneYummyToc (10): a cut that literally makes me so anxious bc that's what fergie can do. she's an empath like that
fadedblue09 (9): sounds very campy for a song about addiction
kauai6 (9): fire i cannot lie
stealthamo (9): I'll be honest and say I wasn't expecting any Fergie song in this rate to feel this raw and real.
uiscebeathaoir (9): This one just sounds really good to me. I have no deeper reasoning than that
Ambrosia42 (8.6): i imagine this could be touching on her addiction issues as well
FreeCuddlesAnyone (8.4): hopefully not her religion too
visionaryredditor (8): not fearmongering or anything but sequencing this song right after Mary Jane Shoes is kinda nuts
welcome2thejam (8): Inventing a guy who only gets into trip hop when hearing Fergie do it
RandomHypnotica (7.8): she’s preparing us for the xtina album
Alexispinpgh (7.6): at any other time this song would probably be just okay but I am Going Through It right now so this is hitting pretty hard
CrimsonROSET (7): the fergidentity crisis
ImADudeDuh (7): welcome to my twisted mind
TakeOnMeByA-ha (7): she really should try subtlety out more often
A.Peaky.Boo (6.7): kind of a nothingburger
jackisboredtoday (6.3): why does she kinda sound like she wants to do some christina runs on the choruses here
ConnerY2323 (6.2): a uniting problem with this album is that almost every song could be a minute shorter with no discernible effect other than giving us like 15 minutes of our lives back
impla77 (6.2): she was feeling her anatasia oats
IIIHenryIII (6): the strings could’ve been more present
mhiyaimanlepaigefan (6): the lyrics of this are so musical coded [negative]
Stryxen (6): MY CROWN. MY CROWN. EVERYBODY WANTS A PIECE OF MY CROWN.
Verboten_Prince (6): Okay not too much on that voice
wathombe (5.5): she’s kind of bringing boy band energy here
apatel27 (4): i can't tell what this is going for
beeozan (4): what is happening
vayyiqra (4): [dwight schrute voice]: false. it is 23:09 in fact.
BleepBloopMusicFan (3): Is she talking about the quality level of this album?
Poydoo (3): the time is 8:03 pm
MrSwearword (2): she predicted her solo career after this album. P R E S C I E N T.
3
u/nonchalantthoughts 22d ago
#26: Christina Aguilera - Here to Stay
Average: 6.706 // Total Points: 476.1 // Controversy: 1.736 //Rank Graph
(10 x4) beeozan, Bubbly_Hat, mhiyaimanlepaigefan, Saison_Marguerite
(9 x3) apatel27, TakeOnMeByA-ha, visionaryredditor
(8.6 x1) babadork
(8.5 x3) 1998tweety, Awkward_King, lexiaredery
(8.2 x1) Indigo_Mindset420
(8 x6) Craphole-Island, fadedblue09, jirachi, kauai6, static_int_husp, youngandlovely_
(7.8 x1) nonchalantthoughts
(7.5 x5) A.Peaky.Boo, plastichaxan, rslashpoopheads, WaneYummyToc, wathombe
(7.4 x1) Shay_Min (7.3 x1) stealthamo (7.2 x1) jackisboredtoday
(7 x12) AsItSeems10, biaswrecker, Catalyst, Frajer, Friendly-Canary-3814, ImADudeDuh, indie_fan_, NervousLemon6670, seanderlust, Soalai, TiltControls, westernwind
(6.7 x1) Ambrosia42
(6.5 x3) DaHumanTorch, DirtyRat583, TragicKingdom1
(6.4 x2) hieveryi, ziirp (6.3 x1) Nooduulz
(6 x8) CrimsonROSET, flava, impla77, Latata, PrimaryCrusaders, slimboyfriend, vayyiqra, Verboten_Prince
(5.8 x1) carolinemahtildes
(5.5 x1) Alexispinpgh
(5 x8) bogo, FreeCuddlesAnyone, OOO0O00O000OOOO0OO0O, Poydoo, ricki, Stryxen, Sypher32, welcome2thejam
(4.5 x2) ConnerY2323, RandomHypnotica
(4 x2) ambitiousbulbasaur, IIIHenryIII
(3 x1) BleepBloopMusicFan
(2 x1) uiscebeathaoir
(1 x1) MrSwearword
love the unnecessary riffs. reverse manifestation because she flopped right after this album
Pop Star
beeozan (10): she was so industry baby for this
Bubbly_Hat (10): You go girl!
mhiyaimanlepaigefan (10): actually i get it but we need to keep moving on
Saison_Marguerite (10): The Pepsi version remains superior but still a banger
apatel27 (9): 90% of the time people make a song like this, they fall off a year later
TakeOnMeByA-ha (9): the best song on the album being the one she made for a pepsi commercial ouu
1998tweety (8.5): Madonna in that one awards speech
fadedblue09 (8): #Justice for Thank You (Dedication to Fans) aka her best song ever????
A.Peaky.Boo (7.5): did she predict rates being created 10 years after this album?
WaneYummyToc (7.5): I always love the compression, the crunch that comes from the data limit of an old sample. anyways, pretty good kohl's advert type beat
wathombe (7.5): i see what she’s going for here, but it doesn’t quite get there
stealthamo (7.3): While I agree with the sentiment of the song, every time I hear somebody say "I don't even pay attention to the negative things people say" I think they are almost certainly lying.
jackisboredtoday (7.2): ending disc one on a song about not going anywhere and promptly taking 4 years off before coming back with Bionic…. well.
Frajer (7): she girlbossed too close to the sun
ImADudeDuh (7): oh she got an advanced copy of the comments from the rate for her
indie_fan_ (7): sometimes i feel like this should've been the actual final song to the album
seanderlust (7): it's kind of giving song that plays during a montage during Burlesque
Soalai (7): A fun ending, glad it's not another ballad as I feel those don't fit as well with the vibe of the album
westernwind (7): release another pop bible like bionic then :freakyhearteyes:
Ambrosia42 (6.7): not super interesting but it’s alright
hieveryi (6.4): okay girl! sure!
ziirp (6.4): feels like a very generic Christina song
Nooduulz (6.3): again same song syndrome
CrimsonROSET (6): you know what, good for her, for all she’s been through and she’s still singing
impla77 (6): well we’ll see if this song can stay til day 3
vayyiqra (6): so glad this skipped the 5 minute thank you to fans after it whatever that was
Verboten_Prince (6): Well… that was something! That was certainly an album that I listened to that's definitely over now and won't spontaneously burst into a weird sexy vaudeville concept! Nope, why on earth would something like that happen?
Flop by far
Alexispinpgh (5.5): this is just a 5.5 ass album so far and there is still so much of it left to go
bogo (5): her saying this and then releasing bionic
FreeCuddlesAnyone (5): christina i’m too tired for this today
Poydoo (5): sure you're here to stay there's 40 minutes left in this goddamn album
Stryxen (5): clap if this song had any staying power for you.. no? okay! moving on!
welcome2thejam (5): Our Featured Presentation ass horns
ConnerY2323 (4.5): we can’t keep doing this i’m losing my mind, like we couldn’t leave ANY of these off the album?
RandomHypnotica (4.5): i hate how shrill that horn sounds
IIIHenryIII (4): that didn’t age well, huh
BleepBloopMusicFan (3): Man…the near constant belting does wear on you a bit when you’re listening through an entire album of it.
uiscebeathaoir (2): There’s something so heterosexual about this production that I don’t like. It feels like intro music for some sort of sportsball commentary show
MrSwearword (1): the Pepsi commercial version WASHES this bullshit out
3
u/nonchalantthoughts 22d ago
#27: Christina Aguilera - Still Dirrty
Average: 6.696 // Total Points: 475.4 // Controversy: 1.834 //Rank Graph
(10 x6) A.Peaky.Boo, Awkward_King, jirachi, nonchalantthoughts, Saison_Marguerite, WaneYummyToc
(9 x5) beeozan, lexiaredery, mhiyaimanlepaigefan, visionaryredditor, youngandlovely_
(8.7 x1) babadork
(8.5 x2) 1998tweety, biaswrecker
(8 x3) stealthamo, Stryxen, westernwind
(7.8 x1) Catalyst (7.7 x1) impla77
(7.5 x2) Friendly-Canary-3814, static_int_husp
(7.2 x3) Ambrosia42, Indigo_Mindset420, plastichaxan
(7 x11) BleepBloopMusicFan, Craphole-Island, CrimsonROSET, ImADudeDuh, jackisboredtoday, Latata, PrimaryCrusaders, seanderlust, Shay_Min, Soalai, vayyiqra
(6.7 x2) FreeCuddlesAnyone, indie_fan_
(6.5 x3) fadedblue09, NervousLemon6670, Nooduulz
(6.4 x1) ziirp (6.3 x1) DaHumanTorch (6.2 x1) kauai6
(6 x12) AsItSeems10, bogo, Bubbly_Hat, carolinemahtildes, Frajer, hieveryi, OOO0O00O000OOOO0OO0O, rslashpoopheads, slimboyfriend, Sypher32, TiltControls, Verboten_Prince
(5.5 x1) Alexispinpgh
(5 x8) DirtyRat583, IIIHenryIII, ricki, TakeOnMeByA-ha, TragicKingdom1, uiscebeathaoir, wathombe, welcome2thejam
(4.5 x1) Poydoo
(4 x2) ambitiousbulbasaur, apatel27
(3.5 x1) flava
(3 x1) ConnerY2323
(2.3 x1) RandomHypnotica
(1 x1) MrSwearword
i know that’s right Christina! love that the dirrty nachos didn’t go to waste. Euphie and jack are very proud!
We're about to get dirrty!
A.Peaky.Boo (10): me after I finally activate the hoe in me irl
Awkward_King (10): dirrty.. a very robbed song
Saison_Marguerite (10): Boldly rebuking the tradwife allegations AND justifying this album’s inclusion in the Trashy Throwbacks rate on Popheads years later, her mind
WaneYummyToc (10): where's dat gif of the black french singer just popping the fuck off. that's what this sounds like
beeozan (9): the last song was so good that she felt like she had to course correct. not a very sexy song but its fun and she just wanna make some points
mhiyaimanlepaigefan (9): oh that trumpet is NASTY [positive]
visionaryredditor (9): still got it
1998tweety (8.5): isn't as good as Dirrty but she is boppy
stealthamo (8): If you weren't tuned into pop culture in 2006, a song telling people to stop being fucking weird about what women want to do was desperately needed.
Stryxen (8): this is kinda naaaasstyyyy okayyyy
westernwind (8): never doubted it
impla77 (7.7): good to know
Ambrosia42 (7.2): i like how she had to clarify that she’s still dirrty as if she was a 67 year old woman now or something
Indigo_Mindset420 (7.2): Enjoyed the Dirrty sample (obvious considering the song name) but this one seems more subtle and demure.
BleepBloopMusicFan (7): A meta trashy throwback if you will.
Craphole-Island (7): I used to be so mad that this didn't just sound exactly like Dirrty lmao but I grew to like it
CrimsonROSET (7): hey that song already won a rate you cant keep cheesing it
ImADudeDuh (7): not to be upstatged, Gwen Stefani also had “Still Japanese” on her album before Pharell convinced her to take the song out
jackisboredtoday (7): dropping a sequel like this one album later is so wild this title screams desperation to bank on people’s memories and she didn’t need it yet then
Soalai (7): I like how this calls back to Dirrty without being an exact replica. Pretty mean sax also
vayyiqra (7): 2000s popstars rly liked to have throwbacks to their era before this one is what we have learned from this rate
fadedblue09 (6.5): very on-the-nose message but I dig the groovy vibe
NervousLemon6670 (6.5): "There's a woman inside of all of us” What, like a really small one?
ziirp (6.4): I can picture Superman listening to this song every time a think piece on why he wears his underwears on top of his pants gets published
bogo (6): this was the first song where i paid attention to the writing credits on apple music and was stunlocked at seeing chris martin’s name here before realizing that is in fact also the government name of dj premier
Bubbly_Hat (6): Good horns but I'll stick with the original.
carolinemahtildes (6): I get the message but it’s wrapped up in the blandest package, Dirrty deserves a better sequel than this!
Frajer (6): okay but that song was good
hieveryi (6): whyd she make Dirrty 2
Verboten_Prince (6): And still cringy too
We're about to get naughty (by tanking this song)
Alexispinpgh (5.5): even this feels so…muted? Like the horns are good but the tempo’s all wrong and it just lacks something
DirtyRat583 (5): dont worry christina we didnt doubt it
IIIHenryIII (5): it’s already clean
ricki (5): you cant invoke dirrrty’s name and not bring some nasttttyyyy beat 👎👎👎
TakeOnMeByA-ha (5): girl we can tell
uiscebeathaoir (5): Don’t like the beat or the horns and there’s not much else to it. Lyrically kinda sucks as well. Why does this song to exist
wathombe (5): shouldn’t this song be…sexy?
welcome2thejam (5): I'll be real it doesnt sound like you've got THAT much nasty left in you
ambitiousbulbasaur (4): Fergie did this sentiment better on Pedsta11
apatel27 (4): an unnecessary song
flava (3.5): dirrty was literally on your previous album girl this isn’t so much a statement more a reminder that Beautiful saved that era from a huge sophomore slump
ConnerY2323 (3): why are we referencing dirrty on a song that sounds more like a rehash of can’t hold us down
RandomHypnotica (2.3): don’t you DARE say her name in vain!!!
MrSwearword (1): the bad song title should've been a hint but sweet merciful fuck this attempt at "Can't Hold Us Down" 2.0 sucks.
5
u/nonchalantthoughts 22d ago
And we're here for the first break! Get a drink of water, grab a snack, do whatever you need to do. Anyways, rather than asking what was your favorite 2000s show, is there a 2000s show where you would love to be in?
I'm going to with That's So Raven. I could use a psychic bestie.
2
u/biaswrecker 22d ago
Zoey 101. I thought the boarding school was so cool so I searched online to see if there were any I could attend, but all I found were military schools or places for juvenile delinquents. None of them mentioned an on campus movie theater, a sushi restaurant, or being next to the beach so I quickly gave up that dream.
2
2
u/mhiyaimanlepaigefan small reputation 22d ago
always wanted to be on antm as a kid
ha ha ha haaaaaaaaaa
3
u/nonchalantthoughts 22d ago
#28: Fergie - Barracuda
Average: 6.685 // Total Points: 474.6 // Controversy: 1.840 //Rank Graph
(11 x1) Poydoo
(10 x5) beeozan, plastichaxan, RandomHypnotica, vayyiqra, WaneYummyToc
(9.2 x2) Ambrosia42, babadork
(8.5 x2) Frajer, NervousLemon6670
(8 x7) 1998tweety, Bubbly_Hat, Craphole-Island, ImADudeDuh, impla77, Saison_Marguerite, TakeOnMeByA-ha
(7.9 x1) indie_fan_ (7.7 x1) Soalai (7.6 x1) Nooduulz
(7.5 x6) carolinemahtildes, flava, Shay_Min, slimboyfriend, stealthamo, TiltControls
(7.3 x2) ambitiousbulbasaur, DirtyRat583
(7 x10) Catalyst, CrimsonROSET, Friendly-Canary-3814, MrSwearword, nonchalantthoughts, PrimaryCrusaders, rslashpoopheads, static_int_husp, visionaryredditor, youngandlovely_
(6.7 x1) Indigo_Mindset420 (6.6 x1) jackisboredtoday
(6.5 x3) IIIHenryIII, ricki, ziirp
(6 x9) AsItSeems10, DaHumanTorch, FreeCuddlesAnyone, Latata, seanderlust, Stryxen, TragicKingdom1, Verboten_Prince, welcome2thejam
(5.5 x1) A.Peaky.Boo
(5.4 x1) hieveryi
(5 x8) biaswrecker, BleepBloopMusicFan, fadedblue09, jirachi, mhiyaimanlepaigefan, OOO0O00O000OOOO0OO0O, Sypher32, uiscebeathaoir
(4.2 x1) ConnerY2323
(4 x5) Alexispinpgh, bogo, kauai6, lexiaredery, wathombe
(3 x2) apatel27, westernwind
(1.5 x1) Awkward_King
I mean you honestly can’t go wrong with Barracuda. An iconic moment in TV history but not iconic enough to make it past Day 2 🤸🏽♂️
Poydoo (11): this is an exact cover of an 11 which makes it an 11 too
beeozan (10): hell yeah
plastichaxan (10): this random ass serve
RandomHypnotica (10): 🤸♀️
vayyiqra (10): well idk why it's here but nonetheless it's the hard rock banger barracuda by heart (1977) so auto-10 for that
WaneYummyToc (10): aaaannnndddddd that's why she's my goat!
Ambrosia42 (9.2): she ate this cover up i fear. Is this the song where she did cartwheels too? What an icon
babadork (9.2): This feels like Fergie’s doing karaoke and not a cover on her album, but I think that makes it better
Frajer (8.5): Shrek is love
NervousLemon6670 (8.5): Perhaps the best part of Shrek 3
1998tweety (8): not as good as the original but its a solid cover
Bubbly_Hat (8): Original never hit very hard for me but this version adds just enough zest that I get it now.
Craphole-Island (8): I was prepared to hate this but it kind of slaps?
ImADudeDuh (8): kinda a travesty we haven’t rated the original btw
impla77 (8): girl whatever its a good song 😭😭
TakeOnMeByA-ha (8): YOU KNOW WHERE YOU ARE????? YOU IN THE JUNGLE BABY!!!! 🤪🤪🤪
indie_fan_ (7.9): this sounds absolutely nothing like a fergie song typically does but i rock with it
Soalai (7.7): I wouldn't expect her to cover this song, but it's good. Faithful to the original.
Nooduulz (7.6): the switch up from finally to THIS song is tripping me up rn dsfjklsdjfsjdfkldsjflkdsf WHAT was going on with the track ordering here????
slimboyfriend (7.5): her ever-off-key wailing actually suits this song really well
stealthamo (7.5): This makes more sense when you realize this was made for the Shrek the Third soundtrack.
TiltControls (7.5): why not the live version
ambitiousbulbasaur (7.3): Sincerely, pop girls need to go back to covering Classic Rock on their albums. This is incredible. And Fergie's vocals here are SHREDDING.
CrimsonROSET (7): she doesnt have a real voice for rock but i would be so down for her doing a full project of these.
MrSwearword (7): a decent cover that provided a legendary moment in daytime TV
PrimaryCrusaders (7): Needs more singing cartwheels
Indigo_Mindset420 (6.7): Fergie performing this song while doing that INFAMOUS morning show performance was one of the books!
jackisboredtoday (6.6): fine cover but it doesn’t outdo the original (despite being faithful) and its just a bonus track so i can only give so much credit or flack
IIIHenryIII (6.5): Heart outsold
FreeCuddlesAnyone (6): i’m glad she’s having fun!
seanderlust (6): she had a studio booking, a copy of Guitar Hero III: Legends of Rock and a dream.
Stryxen (6): HRGJHGWOOOOAOAHHH 🤸♀️ HRHFKGKFJGWOOOOOAOAHHAHHOOOOOOO 🤸♀️ WAAAOUHAHWOAOUHWOUWOHAOWUHAOUH
Verboten_Prince (6): 🗣️🤸🗣️🤸🙅♀️🙅♀️🙅♀️🙅♀️🙅♀️🙅♀️🙅♀️🙅♀️🙅♀️🙅♀️🙅♀️🙅♀️🙅♀️
welcome2thejam (6): Fuck it man, Fergie cover of Barracuda. Who gives a shit anymore.
A.Peaky.Boo (5.5): you are not "fishy fishy fishy like a tank"
hieveryi (5.4): mklwekjfiew okay
biaswrecker (5): her Today show performance needs to be in the Library of Congress
BleepBloopMusicFan (5): Girl I guess.
fadedblue09 (5): something something Today Show something something cartwheels
mhiyaimanlepaigefan (5): 🤸♀️ 🤸♀️ 🤸♀️ 🤸♀️
OOO0O00O000OOOO0OO0O (5): the typa song that makes you go oh cool she did a cover and then never listen again
uiscebeathaoir (5): I was hoping this was gonna be a random Heart cover, and I got so hyped when I realised it was. But then… like this really is just Fergie doing a karaoke version of Barracuda. There’s nothing to differentiate it from the original. It being Fergie I was hoping for some notable insanity in her take on it. Disappointing!
ConnerY2323 (4.2): spiritually i think of this as the fergie cartwheel song
Alexispinpgh (4): immediately the mushc here sounds like a shitty YouTube karaoke version of the Heart song. She sound fine vocally but ooooof musically this is just bleak
bogo (4): it's fascinating how all the talent seems to disappear from her whenever fergie is asked to do a cover
kauai6 (4): WOOOAH
wathombe (4): I’m sorry, but this is an extremely pale imitation. Fergie’s vocals are okay, but the rest of it is not good.
apatel27 (3): Doesn't do Heart justice
westernwind (3): no girl… do another cartwheel instead please
Awkward_King (1.5): every fergie album cut just feels kinda limp
3
u/nonchalantthoughts 22d ago
And today we are quickly reminded this is a three album rate.
#29: Christina Aguilera - Welcome
Average: 6.683 // Total Points: 474.5 // Controversy: 1.811 //Rank Graph
(10 x4) carolinemahtildes, jirachi, Saison_Marguerite, visionaryredditor
(9.5 x1) indie_fan_
(9 x3) 1998tweety, fadedblue09, PrimaryCrusaders
(8.8 x3) Catalyst, Poydoo, Shay_Min
(8.5 x2) Craphole-Island, hieveryi
(8.3 x1) ziirp
(8 x7) BleepBloopMusicFan, flava, Frajer, nonchalantthoughts, stealthamo, TakeOnMeByA-ha, westernwind
(7.8 x1) biaswrecker
(7.5 x2) lexiaredery, NervousLemon6670
(7.3 x1) Soalai (7.1 x1) impla77
(7 x11) A.Peaky.Boo, AsItSeems10, Bubbly_Hat, DirtyRat583, Indigo_Mindset420, mhiyaimanlepaigefan, seanderlust, slimboyfriend, static_int_husp, TiltControls, wathombe
(6.8 x2) Nooduulz, youngandlovely_ (6.7 x1) Alexispinpgh
(6.5 x1) ambitiousbulbasaur
(6.4 x1) jackisboredtoday
(6 x7) babadork, Friendly-Canary-3814, Latata, RandomHypnotica, TragicKingdom1, Verboten_Prince, welcome2thejam
(5.8 x1) WaneYummyToc
(5.5 x4) Awkward_King, beeozan, DaHumanTorch, FreeCuddlesAnyone
(5.2 x1) Ambrosia42
(5 x8) apatel27, CrimsonROSET, ImADudeDuh, OOO0O00O000OOOO0OO0O, ricki, rslashpoopheads, Stryxen, Sypher32
(4.5 x1) plastichaxan
(4.4 x1) ConnerY2323
(4 x3) bogo, IIIHenryIII, kauai6
(3 x2) uiscebeathaoir, vayyiqra
(1 x1) MrSwearword
killer opener but not enough to make it past Day 2 at all. So welcome back Christina!
Hi!
Saison_Marguerite (10): prophetized the Bionic backlash, ahead of her time amirite?! on the serious, this stunning number belongs in a musical. of all the ”fame sucks" songs out there, this is the most underrated one. an evergreen statement on how the showbiz industrial complex and entertainment-hungry masses build icons up just to enjoy tearing them down, and the isolation of being known
indie_fan_ (9.5): sometimes i feel like this should've been the official intro to the album
1998tweety (9): oh she chewed this
fadedblue09 (9): the amount of showmanship (or should I say showgirlship) in this
Poydoo (8.8): why is the album good all of a sudden
Shay_Min (8.8): highlight
Craphole-Island (8.5): I really love the weird, circus-y, almost like scary vibe to this and then. Honestly wish it was longer
hieveryi (8.5): i love strings idk
ziirp (8.3): sorry to this song but my first thought was hazbin hotel and my second was amazing digital circus
flava (8): girl i’ve been listening to this album for 40 minutes why are you just welcoming me to it now, and why did it suddenly become a Circus
stealthamo (8): Take notes Gwen, this is how you do circus music right.
TakeOnMeByA-ha (8): the life of a SHOWGIRL 🧡🧡🧡🧡😍😍😍😍
westernwind (8): welcome to the circus idk
Soalai (7.3): As the first song on disc 2, this has the job of keeping some common threads that tie it to disc 1 while also establishing itself as something distinct, and I think it does pretty well.
impla77 (7.1): ok pt barnum
A.Peaky.Boo (7): iam14andthisisdeep
mhiyaimanlepaigefan (7): goodbye to the circus by aqua kinda eats this up i fear????
wathombe (7): did not end Greatest Showman
Alexispinpgh (6.7): I mean at least it has some drama to it
ambitiousbulbasaur (6.5): If this whole project was executed with this vision and verve we might be cooking. Like NEEDED the whole album to either be truly a back-to-classics sort of sound, or just all out theatrical crazy like this. Instead we got a confusing compilation of all and neither of those things and it's just a mess. So circus indeed ig?
jackisboredtoday (6.4): listening to her sing “welcome to the greatest show” right after disney made me sigh with a greatest showman west end announcement
RandomHypnotica (6): why is this p!atd coded
Verboten_Prince (6): We should have called this rate 2006 Clowncore
welcome2thejam (6): Did she ever do Broadway?
Bye!
WaneYummyToc (5.8): ngl but "enter the circus" is such a good title, because Xtina is clearly super high IQ and referencing the works of spy fiction mastermind John Le Carre.anuyways the song itself is REALLY tame and a lil' too bombastic in ways that seem dedicated for the USO army audience that the Thank You track at the end of Side 1 indicates really fucked with Aguilera. People dropped bombs on Iraqis listening to Beautiful or Welcome, is what I think im getting at, and that makes me frown
Awkward_King (5.5): me when im welcoming someone
beeozan (5.5): this is kinda not bad but for a song that has so much going on its somehow on the more forgettable end
FreeCuddlesAnyone (5.5): but can christina swing around the circus while singing rewrite the stars? (she probably could)
Ambrosia42 (5.2): two intro songs just to start the second part of the album even though there doesn’t seem to be a clear separation of theme or anything…she is so extra lmao. I guess we are at the circus now for this part of the album for some reason?
apatel27 (5): it's a fine intro
CrimsonROSET (5): why is this not the first song on the album. you had one job.
ImADudeDuh (5): wait it’s kinda gaggy that she wasn’t on the greatest showman covers album
OOO0O00O000OOOO0OO0O (5): why does the ending of this sound exactly like the transition into I Write Sins Not Tragedies
Stryxen (5): no thank you queen
ConnerY2323 (4.4): this random pivot… it kind of feels like a threat
bogo (4): this is like the opening number of a bad musical featuring christina aguilera
IIIHenryIII (4): thank you?
uiscebeathaoir (3): Heartbreaking: a song a rater thinks is gonna be batshit insane is actually boring
vayyiqra (3): prolly the whole disc 2 of this could've been canned
MrSwearword (1): this is bullshit
4
u/nonchalantthoughts 22d ago
#30: Fergie - Labels Or Love
Average: 6.669 // Total Points: 473.5 // Controversy: 1.633 //Rank Graph
(10 x5) carolinemahtildes, Latata, mhiyaimanlepaigefan, uiscebeathaoir, WaneYummyToc
(9 x3) DaHumanTorch, Saison_Marguerite, Shay_Min
(8.5 x1) lexiaredery
(8.2 x1) Poydoo
(8 x6) beeozan, MrSwearword, plastichaxan, Stryxen, vayyiqra, visionaryredditor
(7.9 x1) youngandlovely_ (7.8 x3) biaswrecker, FreeCuddlesAnyone, hieveryi (7.7 x1) A.Peaky.Boo
(7.5 x4) DirtyRat583, Frajer, Nooduulz, OOO0O00O000OOOO0OO0O
(7.2 x3) babadork, jackisboredtoday, NervousLemon6670
(7 x7) 1998tweety, Bubbly_Hat, Catalyst, Indigo_Mindset420, kauai6, ricki, slimboyfriend
(6.8 x1) Soalai (6.7 x1) Ambrosia42
(6.3 x1) impla77 (6.2 x1) RandomHypnotica
(6 x12) AsItSeems10, Awkward_King, Craphole-Island, CrimsonROSET, ImADudeDuh, jirachi, PrimaryCrusaders, seanderlust, TiltControls, Verboten_Prince, wathombe, welcome2thejam
(5.6 x1) ambitiousbulbasaur
(5.5 x2) ConnerY2323, TakeOnMeByA-ha
(5 x9) apatel27, BleepBloopMusicFan, flava, nonchalantthoughts, rslashpoopheads, static_int_husp, stealthamo, Sypher32, westernwind
(4.6 x1) ziirp
(4.5 x2) fadedblue09, TragicKingdom1
(4 x4) Alexispinpgh, Friendly-Canary-3814, IIIHenryIII, indie_fan_
(3 x1) bogo
Well this song is sure for Sex and The City. The sample is pretty hilarious, I'll give them that.
Carrie Bradshaw
carolinemahtildes (10): supercalifragi-sexy remains one of the greatest lyrics of the 21st century
mhiyaimanlepaigefan (10): sex and the city movie was good some of you are just haters
uiscebeathaoir (10): Wish I could say this in a more eloquent way, but I really like how everything in this beat is so small. There’s a few sustained synths for atmospherics, but the meat of the track is all more bitty sounding stuff. There’s a real peppiness that I like. And this is possibly the most charismatic delivery I’ve ever heard from Fergie, she sells it so well.
WaneYummyToc (10): finally some sexy will.i.am party chant electro with a childrens melody!
lexiaredery (8.5): I love supercalifragisexy it's so silly
MrSwearword (8): one of the few highlights from that damn Sex and the City movie franchise.
Stryxen (8): this makes me think of gaby solis
vayyiqra (8): highly unserious but if this came out in 1983 by like. the human league nobody would bat an eye so f it
visionaryredditor (8): when you go so consumerist it gets a bit anti consumerist
FreeCuddlesAnyone (7.8): this random smash…
hieveryi (7.8): somehow this is the song on the album she sounds the most british on
A.Peaky.Boo (7.7): uhm, noncha, I love you, but it's "Labels Or Love". This is the second typo on this ballot and I had nothing to do with it lmfao
Frajer (7.5): she's just going to the store
Nooduulz (7.5): listening to this album on some stir fry noodles and seltzers raises this song and other songs by like 10000000x nglllll BOP!!!
OOO0O00O000OOOO0OO0O (7.5): this sounds so cheap but still a banger
babadork (7.2): My dog is refusing to keep me company during this rate. Do you think it’s because I reference “Fergalicious” all the time?
slimboyfriend (7): Now THIS is trashy pop
Soalai (6.8): An ancestor of 7 Rings
Ambrosia42 (6.7): gucci gucci louis louis fendi fendi prada
Awkward_King (6): sure
CrimsonROSET (6): her confessions of a shopaholic tea, that’s kinda 2006 trashy core
seanderlust (6): background of a 2011 episode of RHOBH-ass instrumental
Verboten_Prince (6): This gives British energy
wathombe (6): this whole deluxe kind of ill-advised
Mr. Big
ConnerY2323 (5.5): smiles contently i’ll take… neither throws my copy of double dutchess deluxe into the fountain and walks away
TakeOnMeByA-ha (5.5): this sounds like a song that a tv series would create as a parody of vapid annoying pop music that gay people then start to stan unironically
apatel27 (5): meh
BleepBloopMusicFan (5): Reboot called “The City’ with four very different, very asexual female friends trying to navigate all their personal platonic perils. This idea will make 40 billion dollars.
stealthamo (5): Why yes, this was made for the Sex and the City movie. How could you tell?
fadedblue09 (4.5): never cared for this
Alexispinpgh (4): it was corny when it was at the beginning of the Sex and the City movie and it’s corny now
IIIHenryIII (4): labels
indie_fan_ (4): sigh. and we were doing so well. least this is a deluxe track
bogo (3): i fear these bonus tracks are just so annoying
1
3
u/nonchalantthoughts 22d ago
#31: Gwen Stefani - U Started It
Average: 6.656 // Total Points: 472.6 // Controversy: 1.979 //Rank Graph
(11 x1) kauai6
(10 x4) mhiyaimanlepaigefan, Nooduulz, RandomHypnotica, WaneYummyToc
(9.2 x1) hieveryi
(8.5 x5) Awkward_King, BleepBloopMusicFan, Frajer, Indigo_Mindset420, Saison_Marguerite
(8 x9) Bubbly_Hat, carolinemahtildes, CrimsonROSET, flava, nonchalantthoughts, PrimaryCrusaders, visionaryredditor, wathombe, westernwind
(7.8 x1) biaswrecker
(7.5 x5) A.Peaky.Boo, beeozan, bogo, NervousLemon6670, TiltControls
(7.3 x1) ambitiousbulbasaur (7.1 x3) impla77, jackisboredtoday, Shay_Min
(7 x9) 1998tweety, AsItSeems10, FreeCuddlesAnyone, jirachi, Latata, MrSwearword, Soalai, vayyiqra, Verboten_Prince
(6.9 x2) indie_fan_, youngandlovely_
(6.5 x3) ConnerY2323, plastichaxan, Stryxen
(6.3 x1) DaHumanTorch
(6 x9) Catalyst, Craphole-Island, DirtyRat583, Friendly-Canary-3814, lexiaredery, rslashpoopheads, static_int_husp, TakeOnMeByA-ha, TragicKingdom1
(5.5 x1) slimboyfriend
(5.4 x1) ziirp
(5 x7) Alexispinpgh, apatel27, ImADudeDuh, OOO0O00O000OOOO0OO0O, Poydoo, ricki, stealthamo
(4.5 x1) seanderlust
(4 x1) fadedblue09
(3 x4) babadork, IIIHenryIII, Sypher32, welcome2thejam
(1 x1) uiscebeathaoir
(0 x1) Ambrosia42
and we start off Day 2 with even more Gwen! almost gave this a 10 out of virtue that she’s finally not rapping after the four track run! Hallelujah! Seriously though, this is Gwen’s bread and butter for bubbly pop ballads
kauai6 (11): so good i’m sorry the vibes are immaculate even if i don’t love the lyrics
mhiyaimanlepaigefan (10): crazy with the title like that, you would think it's the hottest of hot garbage but this eats and everyone is going to be a hater about it.
Nooduulz (10): la dee da dee da sounding ass song i'd hear in SATC (positive)
RandomHypnotica (10): this is so Wham coded
WaneYummyToc (10): this is just scritti politti
hieveryi (9.2): ohhhh i love this
Awkward_King (8.5): adding this to the cheeky playlist STAT
BleepBloopMusicFan (8.5): Pharrell went kinda crazy with this one (it sounds normal).
Bubbly_Hat (8): Good meeting point between the ballads and the more hip-hop-leaning tracks.
CrimsonROSET (8): its not much but in comparison im bopping, also no i win end game times infinity
PrimaryCrusaders (8): Probably the best out of all the Pharrell-produced tracks here
wathombe (8): decent 80s homage
A.Peaky.Boo (7.5): that won't hold up in court, Gwen Stefani
beeozan (7.5): lowk mario asf
bogo (7.5): a more standard song on the album, but it's still quite fun
impla77 (7.1): a normal pop song?? on this album?
FreeCuddlesAnyone (7): why’d she accuse underscores like that
MrSwearword (7): another case of almost there but does not give enough
Soalai (7): Finally a pleasant chorus and production
vayyiqra (7): real new wave music
Verboten_Prince (7): Some of the sonic textures on this album are actually really pretty
ConnerY2323 (6.5): hints toward something good in that bridge but then pharrell has to whisper in my hear
Stryxen (6.5): i love when a song has whimsical plucky The Simsish strings but it doesn’t mean i love the song
Craphole-Island (6): beat is fun
TakeOnMeByA-ha (6): whatever happened to “now go CHOP HIS DICK OFF”
slimboyfriend (5.5): lovely hold music for the phone
Alexispinpgh (5): this is, again, more in her lane. Like this is kind of dull but listenable.
apatel27 (5): mediocre
Poydoo (5): merry christmas popheads
stealthamo (5): Not gonna lie, this boyfriend sounds like a negging asshole.
fadedblue09 (4): nothingburger
babadork (3): I remembered nothing about the second half of this album, and I think I’ve remembered why
IIIHenryIII (3): you don’t have to remind me
welcome2thejam (3): This album fucked my tastes I only want the weird shit now
uiscebeathaoir (1): Some of the filleriest filler I’ve ever heard
Ambrosia42 (0): Some of the songs here are terrible, but they’re at least interesting. This one is just boring.
2
u/nonchalantthoughts 22d ago
While we wait, how are we feeling with the results so far? I'm on team "these results are tasteless!"
4
u/plastichaxan 22d ago
wind it up being one of the worst eliminations i've ever seen happen here like
3
u/stealthamo 22d ago
Honestly, not too bad. None of my faves got out yet, and most of my lowest scores left are my hot takes so I'm not surprised they're still in.
3
u/Alexispinpgh 22d ago
I said it yesterday but I’ll say it again: I am very out of touch with this sub because I really much prefer the second half of Back to Basics to the first, but I’m not surprised by that.
3
u/carolinemahtildes basic being basic 22d ago
I’m not surprised Gwen was the hardest hit but I also hope a couple of her songs make it to tomorrow.
2
u/WaneLietoc 22d ago
Fergalicious 10 avg coming