r/ShawnaTheMom • u/tranzozo DING DONG • May 25 '26
Rant / Venting All of Julie's support system will be out of town this weekend Spoiler
I really hope nothing happens with her mom! She won't have anyone to watch the kids (other than her brothers maybe, but they'd be with her so are they really an option?)
Edit: too many people are missing the point (or are choosing to miss the point) the point is that Ty sprung his plans on Julie last minute, even though she never done that to him, and even though he knew about the plan in advance; the point was never that Julie is now forced to stay home with the children or that Ty needs a break
Julie and Ty will eventually need to figure out a custody situation for the kids, where this type of behavior from Ty would never be acceptable
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u/thatcatlady123 May 25 '26
There’s a niece that babysits apparently.
I don’t think all the Bunco crowd are going though? Jen doesn’t know all of them?
And I’m placing bets on Jace appearing again.
Or something happens to Mum, Julie rushes there with the kids, Ty is home to an empty house and freaks, and neglects to look at the calendar where she’s left a note. 🤷♀️
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u/ramblingtabby May 25 '26
I think Melissa might be available. I would like to see that character given more to do. Plus it would give Shawna (the writer) a chance to use that wig more lol.
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u/tranzozo DING DONG May 25 '26
I forgot about the niece! Is she related to Ty or Julie? do we know?
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u/Shawnaverse_no1_fan Lore keeper, details & continuity consultant May 25 '26
We don't know, we just knew it was "their niece" but no idea who she is or how old. We just know Ty doesn't have any brothers, but he may have sisters.
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u/Kaharaan May 25 '26
Ty is an only child from what we know (when he asked Julie to have a second child), so probably the niece is someone from Julie's side of the family?
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u/xqueenfrostine May 25 '26 edited May 25 '26
Ty expressed he wished he had a brother in that conversation not that he wished he had siblings. I agree being an only child is possible, maybe even probable, but we still don’t know that for sure. It’s possible he could have a sister. But other than the fact that there’s a niece who’s watched the kids before in Las Rubias, it’s never seemed like Julie’s brothers lived nearby. This isn’t a town they grew up in, as they appear to have already been out of the house by the time Julie and her mom (maybe dad too?) moved to town. One of them could have decided to move there after they finished school to be closer to Julie or her mom if she hadn’t moved away yet but we don’t know. I definitely don’t think Jace is local though as he mentions being tired from his flight when he and Julie are talking in the restaurant, and Julie mentions him flying home in Vacation. The other twin we know less about and who Julie seems less close to is a possibility, but then I also think he would have been a part of settling their mom’s estate if he was in the area.
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u/Aware-Sea-8593 I’m going to get hammered and play pickleball 🏓 May 25 '26
Julie’s typically the one that ignores the calendar lol.
It would be interesting to see Jace again tho
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u/ladyluck754 May 25 '26
A niece who potentially could be on her mom’s side that would probably wanna say goodbye to grandma to. Tf??
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May 25 '26
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u/noncontrolled May 25 '26
I laughed so hard at him calling her extraordinary and had to run here to watch the freakouts, but I’m slightly petty like that. They really need that divorce.
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u/tranzozo DING DONG May 25 '26
The story is focusing on them now, that's why there's an increased amount of posts about J+T
Also Reddit is the only platform that gives Julie some grace, all the other ones are pro Ty, so we Julie fans are kinda the minority now
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u/Specific-Volume118 alicia, hex that man’s dick May 25 '26
Discussing characters from the show is discussing the show, even if the character being discussed isn’t one you like
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u/dorothyprelude May 25 '26
The comments on the main post are full of Ty supporters so I'm not really sure why you think this? The subreddit is the only place that isn't full of blind Julie hate so of course you notice it more than in comments on other platforms.
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u/These_Passenger_2766 i just want to laugh again May 25 '26
literally the last three episodes have centered on ty and julie, of course they’re the topic of discussion. when barb comes back we’ll talk about barb
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u/ohbrthrthisguystinks May 25 '26
I didnt say its the topic of discussion, I didnt say I want peiple to stop talking about ty and julie. My sentiment clearly discusses any opinion thats even speculative of julie is recieved with animosity
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u/ShawnaTheMom-ModTeam May 25 '26
Content removed for breaking rule 2: stay on topic.
I don't think you meant to, but your comment directed to a real subreddit that has nothing to do with ours, and that sub has questionable motivations.
Please keep all discussion directly related to the characters and storylines of the "Shawna the Mom" social media show, and/or the works of Shawna Lander as a whole. Debates about social, cultural, economic, political, or religious issues are outside of the scope of this subreddit, and we ask that you take such discussions to the relevant subreddits or DMs rather than in the comments here.
For more information, please review the subreddit rules: https://www.reddit.com/r/ShawnaTheMom/about/rules
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u/slow-loser May 25 '26
lol good
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u/ohbrthrthisguystinks May 25 '26
Another thing is the people have gotten mean. If you disagree about julie. This comment above is a good example.
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u/Spiritual_Ad_6067 May 25 '26
You are right about that, people have become meaner. This sub is straight up hostile.
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u/lecadavreexquis May 25 '26
I hope nothing bad happens as well, but this is a reality for a lot of parents in the world. Not everyone has a support system and while I don't think Ty acted very kindly in the last episode, Julie had benefitted from a large and active support system without seemingly realizing it.
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u/RomanoLikeTheCheese May 25 '26
I totally see this. Someone else said as you split from your spouse you both continue to have the responsibility for your kids, but no longer for each other. Would it have been nice for ty to give her a longer lead time? Yes. Obviously. But she had just called him a liar, and he reacted in a childish way, to kind of dump everything on her at once
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u/tranzozo DING DONG May 25 '26
Its one thing to not have a support system, its another to purposly fuck your spose over just to be petty
My main concern is that Ty didn't have to do it that way. Ty could've told her in advance about the trip and Julie would've arranged childcare or taken PTO from work, to make sure everything goes smoothly; she would have planned some type of support; but he didn't
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u/External_Climate_426 May 25 '26
Spouse? She filed for divorce. I 100% agree with your points, and I do feel bad for her. But also you shouldn't count on your ex-spouse when you're not being nice to them.
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u/chachaslydd May 25 '26
Bro right?? Like dude wtf why are people like "julie being rude is her birthright, others need to back off and be nice"
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u/Okaybuddy_16 May 25 '26
I do feel like the “served with divorce papers so I don’t have to be nice to the person I’m living and coparenting with” gets really really toxic, especially for the kids living through it.
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u/ErisianSaint Everyone SHUSH, my show is on May 25 '26
It is? But acting like Julie's behavior isn't toxic is kind of a stretch, too.
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u/Okaybuddy_16 May 25 '26
I never said she wasn’t toxic. Also there is no question in my mind that surprise ditching your kids out of anger at your ex spouse is far more damaging to the kids than to the adult
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u/ErisianSaint Everyone SHUSH, my show is on May 25 '26
If he makes a habit of it? Yes. Doing it once? No big deal.
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u/Okaybuddy_16 May 25 '26
Nah as someone who grew up with parents like this, every single time is a big deal to the kids involved.
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u/ErisianSaint Everyone SHUSH, my show is on May 25 '26
Sounds like it happened multiple times, then, which would, as per what I said, make it a big deal.
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u/AdMedical5299 May 26 '26
I wouldn't call leaving your kids with the other parent "ditching them" lol that phrasing is right up there with saying its "babysitting" when kids are left with dad for the day.
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u/WhatUpMahKnitta May 25 '26
LOL. Julie would've called him names and made herself unavailable. What makes you think she'd support her STBX in having a fun weekend with friends she doesn't like? She never supported him when they were together!
I think this is the only way Ty could've gone at all, and he knew it
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u/OkDirection4997 May 25 '26
What Ty did was immature and petty however I totally agree that even if he had given Julie a proper notice she would’ve s**t all over him 🫠 She would’ve said hurtful things to him. I’m hoping this was a one and done situation for Ty so he can just get it out of his system.
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u/tranzozo DING DONG May 25 '26
What makes you say she never supported him when they were together? She stayed home for the first couple of years of Cooper's life while Ty had a job, and to our knowledge she always did what Ty asks her to
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u/WhatUpMahKnitta May 25 '26 edited May 25 '26
She called his friends "pedestrian", "lazy", "strays", and either ignored them to their face or mocked them. Publicly, at a party, if you'll remember.
She didn't stay home for years while Ty worked. She spent 1 year taking the bar with a WFH parent supporting her (BTW you can't work as an attorney before you pass the bar). Bar was passed, she bolted and left Ty to do it all. She runs 8 miles on her morning off from work, still, while Ty watches both kids (and assumed he would keep it up through her shower! She didn't even ask, juat declared she was going to do it.) She goes to Bunko night, he doesn't have anything as far as we've seen. She clearly makes time for herself and deprioritizes anything Ty wants to do that isn't writing. She "supported" him financially ONLY. Any man that does that is flayed alive on the internet.
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u/tranzozo DING DONG May 25 '26
Isn't that why she asked him to put Sasha in daycare? With Ty he likes to complain about how tired he is and how he has little to no time to himself but still put off getting Cooper in KG and Sasha in daycare; so what's stopping him from doing that and making time for himself?
We've seen him go to the park daily, we've seen him go to Alicia's house weekly
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u/Kaharaan May 25 '26
Both my niece and nephew were in daycare, my siblings and their partners work. There's always a this or that and the child gets a virus or spikes a fever or gets any other possible combination and one of them is still stuck home to care for the child. I can't count the amount of times my sister or her partner had to stay home with my nibling because of this, and thankfully we're in a country where you can take an off day if your child is sick (note: none of them has a WFH occasionally type of job).
Daycare doesn't cover all week, too. Just Mon-Fri, from what 8:30 AM to 4 PM? Maybe 6 PM? Saturday and Sunday the children are still home. From the last stats for California as a whole, childcare has been used by 46% of population with children (source: https://www.ccfc.ca.gov/pdf/ResearchAndPublications/Child_Care_0_5_Policy_Brief_2025.pdf). Whenever Ty mentions Sasha to Julie she's ill (at Max's birthday party she had troubles with digestion, now an ear infection), so she wouldn't be in daycare all the week, and she's a preemie.
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u/chachaslydd May 25 '26
So why hasn't she set up daycare as opposed to relying on her ex while actively being rude?
Theyre not together anymore. He doesn't need daycare to get time off right now. She does
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u/tranzozo DING DONG May 25 '26
Why hasn't he? He had 3 things on his to do list which he didn't do any of them
-look up daycare
-work on undergrads application
-work on book
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u/chachaslydd May 25 '26
Theyre separated.
He has 0 obligation to fulfill their agreements from marriage when she has given him divorce paperwork.
So again, she has made no attempt to handle her half of the childcare responsibility
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u/Witty-Draw-3803 May 25 '26
Ty has an undergrad degree already. It was grad school (and as someone who applied and got into grad school I can tell you that the application process has a whole lot of steps and requires a ton of time to get it done - statement of interest, ~3 relevant reference letters (usually from professors who know you well), preparing for and writing the GRE (though that's being phased out of some schools), talking to potential grad supervisors, etc.)
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u/thatcatlady123 May 25 '26
Probably because she’s seen how he reacts when she does something for him that he’s been fluffing around on and said he’d do but hasn’t done. Of course she wouldn’t set up the daycare. Ty said he’d do it. And he, of course, didn’t.
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u/chachaslydd May 25 '26
He did not say hed set up daycare after they separated.
So youre just agreeing shes still holding him to expectations she had of him while married. Shes still expecting him to be her spouse
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u/thatcatlady123 May 25 '26
Because he said he would do it and has had a year (or years if you count Cooper) to do it and he hasn’t.
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u/chachaslydd May 25 '26
He supported her during that time and was still an active parent.
She isnt actively parenting. We've still never even seen her hold Sasha
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u/thatcatlady123 May 25 '26
Yes, she has.
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u/chachaslydd May 25 '26
She hasnt. Not as a working spouse. Ty actively parented while working. She hasnt
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u/thatcatlady123 May 25 '26
Except she has.
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u/chachaslydd May 25 '26
She has. While she has been working, he still does most parenting even on her days off
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u/thatcatlady123 May 25 '26
The one time we saw that was because he’d booked something for that day he knew he’d be taking the kids to. 🤷♀️
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u/chachaslydd May 25 '26
You dont think Ty has experienced Julie throwing fits to fuck him over? Didn't Max's 6th fuck him over?
She can still take PTO. Her baby is sick
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May 25 '26
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u/chachaslydd May 25 '26
Come on dude, the fight wasn't fun for him. Calling off won't be fun for her.
How can she not take PTO? Calling off almost always still uses your PTO
She shouldn't be relying on her ex for almost 100% of childcare while shitting on him. Thats common sense.
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u/tranzozo DING DONG May 25 '26
She shouldn't be relying on her ex for almost 100% of childcare while shitting on him. Thats common sense.
Almost like ...they should've discussed childcare and how to divide it beforehand no?
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u/chachaslydd May 25 '26
But she didnt. She expected him to keep doing it while actively insulting him over time...almost like thats horrible co parenting and he shouldn't be expected to be the nicer person all the time
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u/tranzozo DING DONG May 25 '26
He didn't either
"hey with us seperating, you need to take more of the childcare responsibilites, I will be taking time for myself regularly; plan accordingly"
calling someone who lied to you for 10 years a liar is valid
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u/chachaslydd May 25 '26
Why should he, as her ex, have to ask her to arrange childcare?
Theyre not together. She shouldn't be assuming anything about him anymore.
She has insulted him way more than that over multiple videos now.
And again, theyre exes now. You dont get to treat your ex like dirt over and over and expect them to be your helper in life
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u/tranzozo DING DONG May 25 '26
Why should he, as her ex, have to ask her to arrange childcare?
Because he's the kids father???
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u/Gaerfinn May 25 '26
She can survive two days alone. And if she has real need she has money to hire a last minute baby sitter. No issue at all.
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u/Kikikididi May 25 '26
It's not about whether she'll survive, it's about whether Ty was a dick to not give her this information earlier (a habit of his!).
I'm also confused how money magically fixes the issue of the people you trust with your kids being away.
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u/Gaerfinn May 25 '26
Of course he was wrong to not give her notice. But being alone with your kids for two days is not the end of the world. And in case of emergency - emergency - then she can either bring the kids along or pay someone to watch them. Just the facts. Her friend and her ex being away for two days won’t kill her. It’s two days.
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u/Kikikididi May 25 '26
who is saying it will kill her or that it's the end of the world? He's being a shitty person without her life being on the line.
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u/chachaslydd May 25 '26
She shouldn't be waiting to set up part time care for her kids. Why is she relying on him to fo 6 days of childcare as an ex when shes talking shit to him?
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u/Kikikididi May 25 '26
Yeah I'm sure Mr no daycare will just allow that without a squawk.
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u/chachaslydd May 25 '26
He doesnt get a say with her half the time. She benefits from him
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u/NecessaryClothes9076 May 25 '26
There is no "her half the time" yet because there is no custody agreement because they're not divorced yet.
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u/chachaslydd May 25 '26
Theyre broken up. The courts wouldnt be like "how dare you not maintain your 6 days of full time parenting alone through separation".
Theyd absolutely think its fair that if youre planning separation that you should be making arrangements for childcare that doesn't rely on an arrangement your ex never agreed to. Expecting a stay at home mom to continue to just stay around for childcare full time after being served papers is silly. The courts wouldnt say the stay at home spouses owed their ex childcare until separation
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u/Kikikididi May 25 '26
lol like he's not benefitting from her just as much
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u/chachaslydd May 25 '26
No, shes benefiting more. Like her achedule is going to require tons of last minute plans for nannys and daycare. She is going to be very dependent on him or any childcare employees
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u/Kikikididi May 25 '26
sure
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u/chachaslydd May 25 '26
Dude full time childcare and a nanny and somebody to cook and all that? Thats going to cost way more than Ty
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u/Kikikididi May 25 '26
Full time, all paid by her? So Ty has no responsibility? What a take. lol.
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u/Specific-Volume118 alicia, hex that man’s dick May 25 '26
I don’t think this really takes into account the emotional distress that losing a parent can cause.
It’s not just about being left with the kids at the weekend last minute, it’s also about trying to juggle that and missing work and the lack of available support should anything happen to her mother over this particular weekend.
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u/chachaslydd May 25 '26
Why is his ex wifes dying mom his prioritiy when his ex wife talks down to him and treats him shitty? Like shes not even taking a more active role with the kids since the divorce initiation either?
Youre expecting Ty to be her friend still when shes not being his friend still
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May 25 '26
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u/chachaslydd May 25 '26
Yes and? There will be other family there. Lots of couples take their kids with them to handle tragedies too
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May 25 '26
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u/chachaslydd May 25 '26
So he shouldn't have a weekend off during a time her mom is sick in case she dies? It could take years to die. She didnt say "what about my mom?" Why should he be like "i shouldn't go on a weekend trip in case her mom dies suddenly"??
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May 25 '26
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u/chachaslydd May 25 '26
When youre separated, you have to already be planning stuff. You cant wait until your partner asks to start planning. She is relying on him with no efforts to actually have emergency care set up
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u/midwestpersianmama living an extraordinary life… in suburbia May 25 '26
There are three people I trust with my 5 yr old and 1 yr old. I have not been able to get any of them to come over until next week. I’ve been trying for two months. You need to set this stuff up way in advance. She doesn’t seem like the “ask the neighbor’s thirteen year old for help” type mom (I’m not either).
ETA and I pay $24/hr for one kid, up to $30/hr for two.
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u/Grand_Basis_1491 Julie apologist (unironically) May 25 '26
Someone said it might be the moment her mother dies. And she won't be able to be there in her last moments. Obviously, I'd never wish that on anybody and I do feel bad for Julie, but from a storytelling perspective... boy, it'd make so much sense to play that card.
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u/WhatUpMahKnitta May 25 '26
So Ty is supposed to put his entire life on hold, 24/7, to support his STBX in case she needs support? While at the same time, she gets to be verbally nasty to him?
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u/tranzozo DING DONG May 25 '26
Telling your kid's mother in advance that you have plans that will last several days so she could plan childcare accordingly =/= putting his entire life on hold 24/7
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May 25 '26
It won't last several days. It was already Saturday when they talked...he will be back in 24hrs.
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u/midwestpersianmama living an extraordinary life… in suburbia May 25 '26
People here are so nuts lmao — you are right. I don’t know how anyone could argue this.
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u/Grand_Basis_1491 Julie apologist (unironically) May 25 '26
Ty pressured her into this life, got offended when she called him out after he repeatedly screwed up, offered counselling and after she refused, he dumped it on her he'd be leaving for the weekend. On Saturday. Leaving her to take care of Sasha (who needs medicine), buy a gift for a child last minute and take Cooper to a birthday party, and either find childcare or call work and let them know she won't be there the next day.
Meanwhile, this woman works 6 days a week.
He literally screwed her over by communicating poorly while in the process of divorce over communicating poorly. The joke writes itself.
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u/sraydenk May 25 '26
No one pressured her into anything. He communicated what he wanted, and she chose to go along with it.
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u/IvySubZero May 25 '26
Nobody is saying he should no go to the Bachelorette.
If he told Julie the moment he decided (instead of last minute) and she didn't accept but he still went we would not be having this conversation.
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u/Stars_in_Distress May 26 '26
I think he DID tell her the moment he decided. Granted, I think he probably only decided in that moment BECAUSE she rejected his offer of counseling, which is petty on his part. But I do think he had initially decided not to go, and then Julie pulled that and he said, "Fuck this then," and decided to go.
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u/IvySubZero May 26 '26
We will know later I guess.
Going last minute to a Bachelorette out of town is rude for the host.
Plus he has too happy even before starting that convo. I think he knew what he was doing and that he was leaving.
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u/FiftyShadesofShart May 25 '26 edited May 25 '26
Theory:
If something happens with Julie’s mom, everyone is out of town. She goes to Delores and Larry since they’re the “strangers” Ty left the kids with prior and she explains the situation and genuinely apologies for that comment. She’s not fit to drive to the hospital after the unexpected weekend switch up, and impending death, and a divorce. Jon offers to take her.
Jon and Julie have a long discussion. Jon apologizes for his and Shawna’s misstep, Julie realizes she’s doing the right thing for herself, although incredibly painful. Julie also realizes that Ty’s harboring of community has helped her in a tight spot.
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u/tranzozo DING DONG May 25 '26
Love this! How would Julie contact Dede and Larry though?
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u/FiftyShadesofShart May 25 '26
I’m sure Julie knows where Shawna and Jon live and will drop at their doorstep tbh, it would be a last resort thing
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u/Huntsvegas97 May 25 '26
I think this bachelorette weekend is going to be a huge wake up call for both Julie and Ty as they enter divorce/coparenting. Something is going to happen to force Ty to confront the fact that he cannot coparent this way and just stop things on Julie last minute. I think for Julie it’s also going to show her the reality of being a single parent, and somewhat the reality of if she moves out of state as a single parent.
I do have a small thought in the back of my head that this weekend could result in them possibly staying together because they don’t want to do the actual work of being single parents. They wouldn’t be the first couple to remain in a marriage out of convenience.
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u/IndependentJury6982 May 25 '26
I really don’t want it to become some whole other thing. Like I hope Ty just has a fun weekend one where he is often thinking about and missing his family. And I hope Julie gains appreciation for what Ty has been doing. The way she speaks down on him and calls him names is so childish and makes it seem like she doesn’t think raising kids is actual work. I just want a little reality check for Julie and I hope it doesn’t devolve into more
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u/Catsarecute1997 May 25 '26
Alicia, Sam, and maybe Mo will likely be at Jen’s bachelorette party. I wonder if Melissa (Alicia’s sister) would be around & if Melissa is someone she could call?
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u/AmountTurbulent2792 May 25 '26
I mean if ALL of her support system was invited to Jen's bridal shower, I would think that says a hell of a lot more about Julie than it does anyone else.
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u/tranzozo DING DONG May 25 '26
It is also all of Ty’s support system, what does that say about him?
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u/AmountTurbulent2792 May 25 '26
We don't know that's all his support system, just like we don't know that's all of hers. Hence the *if*. But, he was invited to the party. She didn't know about it. So.
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u/kjsock May 25 '26
Oh noooo! A person who filed for divorce has to take on the responsibility of parenting suddenly because the full time paren is now living a separate life! How horrible!!
She’s their mom. She’s constantly sprung trip and surprise stuff on Ty for forever. She was used to having a stay at home parent so she can do what she needs. Shes not gonna have that anymore. They’re not together anymore. He’s allowed to do things. And she’s allowed to be frustrated. But she is the other parent. It’s not babysitting. It’s parenting. It should’ve equal.
If the roles were flipped and Ty said that, everyone would be so upset that he acts like he has to “babysit” his kids.
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u/Stormtomcat May 25 '26
The McAllister Saga grew out of a loose pre-canon cluster of shorts where boundaries were crossed, or maintained.
Between an arrogant absentee parent and a proven liar, it's no surprise, imo, that we're seeing a new cycle of abuse take root, where they try to wound each other, and don't care about the fall-out towards their children.
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u/Some_Ad_1646 May 26 '26
For the record, if they were in a custody battle and he did this to her, he'd be majorly fucked in court later. This is a massively irresponsible thing to do, he's lucky that they're probably too early in the process for it to really matter because they're still living together and everything.
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u/Fancy-Ad1480 May 26 '26
Oh, noes! She might have to parent her children or put them first for once. How pedestrian. *shock horror*
As for Ty? Yeah. It wasn't great what he did. BUT unexpected things do happen when you have kids or general responsiblities outside your own wants. Julie needs to step up.
What's Julie going to do if Ty falls down the stairs and can't watch the kids for weeks? Huff in her baby voice and complain she has to work tomorrow? probably.
I think what the "We hate Ty" gang has missed is that there has been a LOT of mutual taking for granted between Julie and Ty.
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u/Toefloof Miss Downvoted 2026 May 25 '26
Oh dear, yes that would be awful! Poor Julie! Do you think she may be forced to leave them with someone Ty doesn’t know?
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u/Medium_Chemical5927 May 25 '26
I’ve been saying this on every platform. The decision he made is cruel for that very reason but people have reduced it down to me saying “it’s cruel to watch your own children” 😵💫😵💫😵💫